When life hands you lemons :: tie life up at gun point and be like … how u like me now life?

… or at least assault a police officer :: violate your probation … and keep being a complete and total fucking junkie.
If only boiler room suck-job John Paul Raygoza had better taste in motivational wall hangings :: he may have avoided the jail time that is sure to follow the problems his actions have piled on top of the problems he created with his other actions … it’s complicated. Like …

Clint Dempsey scored the first ever American hat-trick in England’s Premier League! It’s no big deal or anything :: unless you love the world’s most popular sport … or you love America {or Texas I guess} … then maybe it’s kinda a big deal.
Sure :: it’s got jack shit to do with this blog … but Jason’s been sick so just fucking deal with it.
Too much TV has been proven by dentists to help with the flu :: and maybe even the plague … so you’re covered if things turn …

I’m fucking against the SOPA :: and the PIPA … and the Santa Maria. I just blacked out my whole glorious fake robot site to prove it {and for fear of defying Wikipedia}. According to The Times of New York :: the protests and bellyaching are working … and the stupid old men of the stupid old man Congress {which is like a series of intestinal tubes} are caving.

“A freshman senator, Marco Rubio of Florida, a rising Republican star, was first out of the starting gate Wednesday morning with his …

The Stop Online Piracy Act is like the DMCA … except worser.
I’m against it.
I think it’s dumb.
I fart in its general direction.
I think it won’t help protect Intellectual Property {a worthy end}.
I’m so against it that I’m embedding the above Vimeo video that other thought leading thought leaders are fearlessly embedding {I haven’t actually watched it but I think that’s how these things are done}. It reminds me of the time I had a Vimeo account :: after I got banned from YouTube and I set …

Philip Zimbardo :: Stanford Psychology Professor :: and totally KickAss guy:

Most of the evil in the world comes about, not out of evil motives, but from somebody saying, “Get with program. Be a team player.”

Professor Zimbardo’s famous Stanford Prison Experiment is the last science nugget in this multi-award winning Sheeple series.
The Sheeple in this experiment were all students at Stanford.  Idiots :: Fools :: ChuckleHeads :: Brainless Rainbow Chasers?  Nope!  Smart as fuck :: over-achieving :: naive optimists.  The editor of this blog {also rumored to be “smart as fuck”} …

Which of the three turds on the right :: matches the turd on the left?  Wait :: Wait :: Don’t answer that yet.  First let the other people at your table answer …
Al Gore:  The correct answer is one … the hot chick at the death cover up party.
Bono:  It’s one … the dancing dark demon of disco.
Abraham Lincoln:  One.
Britney Spears: It’s one … “Oops, sometimes people die at the mall” girl.
… okay now you.  And everyone is going to hear your answer.
In the Asch Confromity Experiment :: it’s not …

Why didn’t James Arthur Ray’s Death Lodge victims get up and leave before their internal organs shut down?  It was hot as hell in there :: and it must’ve stunk of sweaty white people.  And why would anyone pay 10K for that crap-fest in the first place?
Why would otherwise smart people give Not-Doctor Kilstein $2,000 per month for Not-Coaching?
Why did Colleen jump?
Why did people pay $800 per month for BullShit StomperNet?
Why are Sheeple so fucking gullible?
Why? :: Why? :: Why? :: blah :: blah :: blah.
Why are we still asking …