Mark Shurtleff :: Orange is the New Green

Shurtleff-Swallow-Utah-Mugshot-MLM

Two former attorneys general of the scam state of Utah :: Mark Shurtleff and John Swallowhave just been arrested.

Wow :: OMFG … that felt so good to say. I wanna do it again!

Mark Shurtleff and John Swallow … have just been arrested.

Holy shit! :: felt just as good the second time.

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My Herbalife Job Interview

I seriously need a new job. Nothing too fancy or anything :: just something that pays better than my current salary of less-than-nothing-plus-death-threats-and-torments-and-lawsuits-and-droolers. Shouldn’t be too hard to beat.

The minimum wage in Ohio {my new home base} is $7.95 per hour {$318 per week} :: so that’s like a huge promotion for me and stuff … I’ll take it!

But first I have to find it …

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Herbalife’s Bankruptcy Business

Michael-Burton-Herbalife-Bankruptcy

“I LOVE HERBALIFE …”

… is what Herbalife President’s Team member Michael Burton said to me :: unconvincingly … this past fall when I was fake robotic questioning him about his various scum sucking.

“I will be sharing the great health results of the products with people and possibilities of how Herbalife can help as long as I am on this planet.”

Says he … sounding so serious.

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Jesus Christ Utah Star

Jeremy Johnson :: The Christ-like Ginger King of the Mormon Mafia … in The New York Times.

It’s good … but it’s bad.

In Utah, a Local Hero Accused

Seems like a pretty fucking annoying headline :: because JJ is so obviously not a hero … but he was in fact a local hero. It says something scary dangerous about the particular local.

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The Crystallization Method

Crystal-L-Cox-ChatterBox

Remember when The Gnome thought he could come at me?

… or when Jeff Walker’s poison head exploded?

… or when Rick Calvert was stricken with some kind of taco related insanity?

… or when Mike Koenigs got all butthurt {cruel pun intended} about that time IĀ embarrassedĀ him in front of his big toothed boyfriend Tony Robbins?

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