Vitaly Borker has angrily pissed on his last pair of knockoff Dolce and Gabbana’s. Just eight days after The New York Times detailed the sketchy/insane “business practices” of Decor My Eyes :: the bunghole borscht aficionado was arrested in his Brooklyn home by agents of the United States Postal Inspection Service.
The New York Times once again …

“Vitaly Borker, 34, who operates a Web site called decormyeyes.com, was charged with one count each of mail fraud, wire fraud, making interstate threats and cyberstalking. The mail fraud and wire fraud charges each carry a maximum sentence of 20 …

If you’re not wearing Versace 2049 Sunglasses :: then you are shit. I know it’s harsh :: but seriously :: you are one of the dirt people.  When the plague comes {and it will come} :: you will be the first to die … because the plague respects $300 fashion accessories.
If you search The Google for “Versace 2049 Sunglasses” :: the top result is a little ma-and-pa operation called Decor My Eyes.

The awesome thing about Decor My Eyes is that they might :: to summarize a recent New York Times article :: overcharge you …

Copyblogger’s Brian Clark no like me.
Me so sad :: me want to cry. How will me ever succeed on the blogs now?
I’ve been critical of Brian Clark’s vapid message :: his parasitic existence :: his censorship of dissent :: his being a big fat unreasonable bully :: and the total uselessness of his useless products.
Ouch.
Even worse {for Brian Clark} :: in spite of my outrageous outrageousness :: this fake robot website has become big and important … and whatever I’m bitching about seems to go right to the top of the search results.
Sorry Charlie … …

Scribe SEO :: the first two words of this post are Scribe and SEO.  It doesn’t make that much sense.

Remember when I already used this photo?
Its file name is :: copyblogger-sonia-simone-brian-clark.jpg
What a lame and stupid file name. Back in the before time :: it would have had a fucking awesome name like …

awkward-moments.jpg
dumpy-love.jpg
touching-more-than-the-hem.jpg

… delicious! Those are file names you can believe in god damn it.
But then some of you conformist pussies were all like :: “use your title and image tags more effectively and you’ll rank better”.  And I was all …

Kajabi Scam Fraud Review Sucks Refund.
Dot com.
I should do a review of The Syndicate’s latest frauduct Kajabi :: for the good of the “community” and the “industry” … ready :: set :: go!
{beginReview}
1. Kajabi is a scam.  Hello?  Duh!
2. Why in the name of fucks fuck would you put your business data on servers owned by Andy Jenkins? Forget about him misusing it :: maybe he’ll make it public to the entire web and it will end up with me! Is that what you want? You see what a freak …

Ryan Deiss’ Perpetual Traffic Formula :: just take a moment to savor the name :: Google that is … I’m talking to you Google GOD DAMN IT. Savor the fucking name!!
“What name?” asks the spirit of Google via a Lily Dale medium.
Great question spirit of Google :: Ryan Deiss’ Perpetual Traffic Formula …
{savoring} {… still savoring} {… savoring dash of smoldering} {and done.}
Ryan Deiss Perpetual Traffic Formula RipOff
{and done for realz.}
Perpetual Traffic Formula REFUNDS
{… resavoring}
Done.
“They” say that 80% of SEO is negging on Google :: keeping her interested but …

I’ve recently noticed that there are a lot of scams out there. Surely there is something we can do about it! At first I was like: “I should definitely send a letter to the Post Master about all this.”  But then the Surgeon General warned me that the Post Master might cause cancer of the fetus … and then I was like: “Wow!  Fuck that!”  I just can’t afford to take the risk right now … my fetus runs my entire laundry and dry cleaning operation.
So I guess I’ll just register …

A whole fucking week without me!  Oh lord how you must have suffered :: stuck contemplating the trivialities of your own banal existence :: void of humor and style :: lost like an ugly child at the State Fair … wandering around in pig/chicken shit … crying out for your momma and licking the residue of liquid cheese from inside the ocean bound plastic that served up your SuperNachoCornDog™.  Whatever :: I’m back!  Shut up and do everything I tell you.
Speaking of finger food pig fuckers :: Ed Magedson.
Ed Magedson …

Russell Brunson has had a rough life.  Growing up :: all he had was everything :: and you know how hard that can be. Okay maybe you don’t {loser!} :: but that’s your own fault for not manifesting the right kind of parents.
The High Priest of Mormon hypocrisy fought his first round with The Salty Droid last November.  Unfortunately for fans of talking turds :: and mirroring ALL of his “important” wrestling matches :: the fat bitch lost! The post exposed Brunson as the owner of a high pressure sales …

There is a WAR going on between The Salty Droid and Not-Doctor Harlan Kilstein {maybe you’ve heard?}. One of the least important battles in that war is the struggle to dominate the Google rankings for the useless search term “harlan kilstein.” The ManTurd and The Droid have different approaches to the problem {natch!} :: Different Strokes for different folks/fucks.
:: The Kilstein SEO Method ::
1.  File false DMCA claims for ANY blog post :: video :: or picture that ranks on the first page.
2.  Set up a bunch of crap blogs …