Lying is how assholes get sex. Most people won’t have sex with an asshole on purpose :: so assholes have evolved various guises and disguises to cloak their wretched stink from nice people for just long enough to steal a one night stand … or a short and ill-fated marriage that your mother totally tried to warn you against but you wouldn’t listen because he said he wanted to start an orphanage someplace fucking awful … like New Jersey.
It’s not cool {or okay even} to lie someone out of their …

James Arthur Ray :: the play … okay?
Tickets are $15,000 :: no refunds … or complaining.
Okay maybe not :: tickets are some other price that won’t tend to make random people on the interwebz exclaim … “you deserve to die!”
But getting to Scotland isn’t easy :: unless you’re Mary Poppins … or god. Fortunately I am :: god that is … not Mary Poppins.
I am god.
Okay maybe not :: but I do have interesting and articulate readers all over the world … including The Scot-lands. It makes me feel quite …

The first confesstimonial was a big hit :: and in a more interesting than usual comment stream … it spawned the second confesstimonial. Once your blog posts start producing progeny :: you can retire to the beach to live the tanned twinkie lifestyle … fact.
The video is The Vergecast from the morning the Scamworld article printed. It’s pretty funny to listen to real Internet experts laughing about fake Internet experts :: and then Danny Sullivan calls in to ruin my laughter … but I’ve let go of that anger now because …

“It was 10:45 p.m. on a cold night in January 2012 when a black car slowly pulled into the driveway of Johanna Quinones’ Sandy home and parked with the engine running.”

The car belonged to Utah’s corrupt and oafish Attorney General Mark Shurtleff. The ridiculous Mr. Shurtleff was escorting one of his criminal boyfriends :: Sov Ouk … on mission to intimidate and torment Ms. Johanna … Sov’s long-suffering ex-wife.
Johanna met Sov on a vacation to the United States in the 1990′s. Quite ironically :: she left her LDS family in …

It’s fun to tell jokes about Black America Online :: because it was called Black America Online … and that’s funny.
Black America Online.
See? Funny.
The failed techno-blaxploitation of what was to become the uncoolest of uncool tech companies == funny.
You thought you got mail :: but you got Shaft … up to here.
Ha!
Anywayz :: I’m sure it wasn’t funny to the people involved … and they’d like to smack my face off.  But investing money into new {or old} business ventures is a great way to lose money. Most businesses fail …

Did you know that black people like using the Internets just as much as white people?
Yep :: it’s totally true … they love it!
But the blacks have high standards :: having grown accustomed to special but equal facilities created with their specific concerns in mind … or something. They can’t be settling for no white man’s Internet … I guess.
Maybe those are some of the considerations that led Stephen Pierce to found Black America Online {or maybe it was the love of other people’s money}.
From a 1997 article by Peter …

http://vimeo.com/15299782
Linda Eaves is Naomi Dunford’s bitch :: according to Linda Eaves.
Being the bitch of a know-nothing loser is not recommended by The Salty Droid :: but my recommendations are rarely taken because I’m just a unicorn hater. If unicorns aren’t real :: then real life is real … and nobody wants to believe that depressing shit.
After an hour-long consult with the IttyBiz spider :: Linda finally settled on the basis for her Internet freedom business. I hope she won’t mind if I spoil the surprise and tell you  … it’s granting wishes.
Wishes …

How you like me now Naomi Dunford?
Shit Storms happen!
 
It’s probably best not to do your own viral marketing campaign for my site during a run-up to a ShitStorm :: unless you have a “career” death wish {not to be construed as a death threat [allegedly]} … but maybe I just don’t know cause I’m not a problogger.
Above are the pageviews for the last seven days on the FakeRobot and ChubbySpider websites. Her views peaked on the 30th :: the day after her fake death threat post. But with a little {/lot} of …

“I’m going to tell you a story and it’s very, very important. Please read it, all the way through. Women’s lives are at stake.”

One of my posts could start like that :: if I were a shit-trite writer … cause women’s lives are at stake. The after effects of protracted manipulation are regularly deadly … as Kirby :: Liz :: and Colleen might tell you if they weren’t already dead. And it’s not hard to imagine how often something like this …

… leads to a nice old{ish} lady deciding to …

Remember how horrible that scamming real Debbie audio was?
OMG.
OMFG even.
It was like a 6.66 on the Shit Scale :: one of the highest SS-numbers ever registered on the fake robot blog.
The Shit Scale is a very scientific {trust me} measure of something’s FUCKING TRUTH in relation to the hype-truth / cult-truth / lie-truth to which it relates. High Shit Scale evidences reveal the blackness at the core of the unicorn machine :: and have a tendency to cause Shit Storms. Oh shit :: here comes some now {watch out for turds!} …