Remember when The Gnome thought he could come at me?
… or when Jeff Walker’s poison head exploded?
… or when Rick Calvert was stricken with some kind of taco related insanity?
… or when Mike Koenigs got all butthurt {cruel pun intended} about that time I embarrassed him in front of his big toothed boyfriend Tony Robbins?
Yeah :: too easy … those were the best of times. But such direct confrontations are a rarity … prolly because people are very intimidated by all the beeping. It’s too bad :: cause when the story tells …

It’s finally happened :: I’ve been sued.
Was it …

The Homicder?
The Great Pyramid?
The Godfather?
The Giant?
The Gnome?
The Spider?
The Rick Calvert’s Tacos?

Nope :: it was Eliot Bernstein … who’s totally going to get a nickname as soon as I figure out who the fuck he is.
I mean here he is giving a “Presidential Campaign Speech” without his top or bottom teeth …

… so we have that :: but I’m not sure if it really clears anything up {or maybe it clears everything up?}.
Unfortunately for me :: it’s serious … trillions online on the …

Donate to the Kevin Trudeau legal defense fund now! Now motherfuckers … NOW!

“Here’s the bottom line. I believe the government wants to lock me in prison for life and virtually burn all of my books. Your first amendment right to FREEDOM OF SPEECH is being violated.”

You’ve prolly never heard of virtual book burnings :: cause it’s totally 2.0 … and you’re a 1.5 at best … which is why you’re always being virtually violated.
It’s not Kevin’s not-right to do whatever the fucks Kevin wants that’s under threat here … it’s …

Doctor Doctor Doctor Doctor Leonard Coldwell :: board certified PHDoctor … has had enough of me. Last time I talked to him :: and he didn’t have the man-sack to talk back to me … I was calling him Barbara. He loved it :: in a sexual way … allegedly. But I guess it’s not fun to threaten someone who offers to die in the streets :: and let’s face it … bullies prefer ladies.
So Heir Klein :: prove to us that you’re innocent of the charges levied against you {by …

“You have no idea what you’re getting yourself into …”
… said some peeps from Crystal Cox’s past and present after I slapped her a couple times across her puffy dumb dumb face.
Whatevers :: says me :: you peeps got no idea what I’m already into … this one is nothing to me.
Crystal Cox’s freaknuts bullshit predates the Internet :: just ask anyone who has ever come within sniffing distance of her grandma pants. She’s mean :: and cruel … and in a surprise to no one who’s read a single …

Are you a soul-destroying scammer who’s irritated by the constitutional rights of the little people?
So annoying!
Are you worried that all your boiler room monies are going to run out now that you’ve burned every fucking bridge in Madison County?
Stupid bridges!
Then Vorys, Sater, Seymour and Pease :: Attorneys-at-Scam can help! At Vorys {pronounced voyeurs} … we believe in your right to fuck over the little guy. If the little guy deserved to have rights … then he’d already have enough money to hire his own whore law firm.  Am I right?
Of course …

Dear LameLawyers {to whom I’ve sent private notice of this open public letter} ::
That’s your client’s nipple right there :: he likes to show it to all his professional contacts on the facebooks … because he’s a tiny insecure freak stain with no education or skills.
But that’s not really the problem is it?
Nope.
The problem is that Stephen Pierce is a scammer … a totally fucking heinous scammer.
You wouldn’t have to be a world famous scam expert like me to know it. You could just be a lawyer who gave a …

Four score and seven years ago …
… starts a famous speech that I can totally plagiarise because its author and his nut-job wife both died before Mickey Mouse invented copyright tyranny. It ends like this …
… that this nation shall have a new birth of freedom … and that this government of the people :: by the people :: for the people :: shall not perish from the earth.
Fuck yeah!
Cause free.dom is a struggle :: it can progress or it can decay … but stasis is a non-option. Project America’s government of …

You know I hate me some gnomes :: the hats :: the tiny dumb dancing :: the chirp chirp singing … and of course the fucking scamming. Maybe it’s not fair to judge all gnomes based on my limited experience with them :: but so what … I don’t have to be fair to gnomes. Fuck you gnomes :: go away and fix some stuff with your dumb little tool sacks.
The Gnome I know is in The Syndicate :: has terrible ideas for family vacations :: has anachronistic disrespect for the …

Remember that time when I pwned Mike Koenigs like a balding little bitch?
Boom!
Pow!
Smack!
Slam!
Whamo!
Okay :: yeah … it’s happened a lot. I like to do things that are easy :: it makes me feel good about myself … like pictures in ridiculous hats.

{start over}
Remember all those times I pwned Mike Koenigs like a balding little bitch {BLB}?
You fucking better … we were just talking about it. Why can’t you remember important shit that we were just talking about? You were never like that before.  Are you taking those danged dirty drugs? …