Remember when The Gnome thought he could come at me?
… or when Jeff Walker’s poison head exploded?
… or when Rick Calvert was stricken with some kind of taco related insanity?
… or when Mike Koenigs got all butthurt {cruel pun intended} about that time I embarrassed him in front of his big toothed boyfriend Tony Robbins?
Yeah :: too easy … those were the best of times. But such direct confrontations are a rarity … prolly because people are very intimidated by all the beeping. It’s too bad :: cause when the story tells …

Brain poisoning manipulator Jeff Walker is product launching his Product Launch Formula for the fifty-thousandth time :: but this time it’s different … because this time the all new PLF is thrice dipped in shit. That’s more than twice the previous once!
… and you can too!
You can read Syndicate member :: and obvious scammer … Jeff Walker’s sales page for PLF.3.ShitDip over on Forbes …

Yes — it’s a new day when a common man barely earning enough to scrape by and feed his family can leverage the Internet into an empire responsible for $400 …

I didn’t write this post :: but I made up the word “confesstimonial” {because making up words is my long tail SEO strategy} … so 100% of the internet monies from this post will go to me {or maybe to Arianna Huffington}. I plan to invest most of those monies in silver … so that’s just stacking wins on top of wins for me right there.
Confesstimonials are first hand accounts from people with direct personal knowledge of these terrible situations. They’d like to speak out and litter the internets with …

Sonia Simone and Naomi Dunford are BFFs :: they bonded early {and often} over their mutual love of other people’s money. In a 2008 post on Sonia’s typepad blog :: celebrating her one whole year anniversary in blogging … she gave a shout out to the unlovely Ms. Spider Dunford …

The now-infamous Naomi Dunford found Remarkable Communication right around the middle of September and showed up for the first time in my comments. She proceeded to start a little blog on home business marketing that instantly trounced mine for traffic and subscribers, but …

Four score and seven years ago …
… starts a famous speech that I can totally plagiarise because its author and his nut-job wife both died before Mickey Mouse invented copyright tyranny. It ends like this …
… that this nation shall have a new birth of freedom … and that this government of the people :: by the people :: for the people :: shall not perish from the earth.
Fuck yeah!
Cause free.dom is a struggle :: it can progress or it can decay … but stasis is a non-option. Project America’s government of …

“Oprah totally loves me now :: she’s getting all my craps for free :: but you should pay enough to upset the normal functioning of your life” :: says Tony Robbins to his email list {basically} …

“You think you have a busy schedule – how about Oprah’s? She showed up at Unleash the Power Within expecting to spend two hours, and 11 hours later she was preparing to walk over hot coals. How did that happen? Watch Tony share details of what it was like to have the legendary Oprah in …

My fake secretary Debbie is on Ray Kurzweil’s email list because she’s all worried that medical progress won’t be able to keep pace with her “chain-smoking while tanning” lifestyle. She’d love to stop the smoke & tan madness :: but she needs it to cover up her diabetic pallor … so she depends on the science of future miracles for comfort.
Says Dr. Kurzweil to Debbie …

Dear Friend,
I’d like to reach out to you personally about a new book that I am very excited about:
Abundance — The Future Is Better Than …

Kim Jong-il :: the great leader of the comrades and god of the many-flowered moons :: is dead at the age of whatever. After his long battle with whatever :: he lost and died … and now I laugh in his dead face.
Above is how the North Koreans {who are just like the regular Koreans except starving} learned of Kim’s timely demise. In case you can’t read Korean sign language :: I think she says something like …
“The Queen is dead … long live the Queen!”
Speaking of Queens :: poor …

Psychopaths fucking love pity parties :: but they also love real parties … because of the free drinks … and jumbo shrimps … and opportunities to steal jewelry and/or spouses.
Stephen Pierce had a party in 2007 :: it was for millionaires only bitches :: or at least for people comfortable saying the word millionaire … very exclusive stuff. Malaysian Internet Marketing expert Patric Chan was at this exclusivity party :: and he told me all about it on his sales page … because that makes perfect sense.

I’m not sure whether …

Dave Navarro wanted to be an Internet Marketer. Like lots of you people :: he wanted to be less of a cog in a big unthinking machine. He wanted to have more time for his family :: and more time for himself. He wanted increased certainty :: and less fear of the future. He wanted things to be different for his kids than things had been for him.
Internet Money!!!!!
FREEDOM!!!!!
 
It started like ten years ago :: books :: CD’s and DVD’s in overly large thud packaging … Tony Robbins.
Five years ago it started …