Four score and seven years ago …
… starts a famous speech that I can totally plagiarise because its author and his nut-job wife both died before Mickey Mouse invented copyright tyranny. It ends like this …
… that this nation shall have a new birth of freedom … and that this government of the people :: by the people :: for the people :: shall not perish from the earth.
Fuck yeah!
Cause free.dom is a struggle :: it can progress or it can decay … but stasis is a non-option. Project America’s government of …

My fake secretary Debbie is on Ray Kurzweil’s email list because she’s all worried that medical progress won’t be able to keep pace with her “chain-smoking while tanning” lifestyle. She’d love to stop the smoke & tan madness :: but she needs it to cover up her diabetic pallor … so she depends on the science of future miracles for comfort.
Says Dr. Kurzweil to Debbie …

Dear Friend,
I’d like to reach out to you personally about a new book that I am very excited about:
Abundance — The Future Is Better Than …

Remember that time when I pwned Mike Koenigs like a balding little bitch?
Boom!
Pow!
Smack!
Slam!
Whamo!
Okay :: yeah … it’s happened a lot. I like to do things that are easy :: it makes me feel good about myself … like pictures in ridiculous hats.

{start over}
Remember all those times I pwned Mike Koenigs like a balding little bitch {BLB}?
You fucking better … we were just talking about it. Why can’t you remember important shit that we were just talking about? You were never like that before.  Are you taking those danged dirty drugs? …

“The Transformational Leadership Council was founded so leaders of personal and organizational transformation could support each other in their contributions to the world.”

… says the Transformational Leadership Council on their website about the Transformational Leadership Council. Sure it’s a shit sentence to use as a tagline :: but understand that many of the world’s most transformational leaders were barely able to complete high school … or totally weren’t able to after getting hung up on the complexities of the 8th grade.
According to an early version of the TLC website …

“The …

Crystal Cox isn’t in the porno business :: allegedly/hopefully :: even though she clearly has a porno name. Crystal PornoName is an “investigative blogger” :: a title that only a very serious person would grant unto herself.
Crystal was sued by some mean lawyers for defaming some other mean lawyers and a Federal judge ruled that …

she wasn’t a journalist so shield and retraction laws don’t apply
she couldn’t Anti-SLAPP him
the mean lawyer wasn’t a public figure under NYT v. Sullivan or a limited public figure under Gertz
the matter :: a big …

Let’s talk about Rachael. It’s obviously what Rachael wants to talk about … other NotRachael things aren’t interesting to Rachael.
Rachael Acklin is the “Caffeinated Elf” :: and she would love for you to join her Rachael based community … the Caffeinated Business Community. For just $20 a month you can access all of the advantages of being in a forum with an absolute nobody like Rachael Acklin.
Rachael’s caffeinated about page lists her various qualifications to bizness coach you to infinity and beyond …

“My oldest two kids were born during my …

Anik Singal has Crohn’s disease! Doesn’t seem too relevent … but it must be super important since he can’t stop talking about it on his about page …

“Anyways, long story short on the health side, I’ve had major problems, spent weeks in the ICU, had many surgeries – but through this entire time, I FOUGHT. I refused to give up. I specifically remember one day about 2 years ago when I was bleeding profusely and in tons of pain in the ICU and when my nurse came rushing in to …

Alison Newton met Dave Navarro 17 years ago at NC State. They were close friends for years before they decided to get matching last names. The matching names were a commitment that they both took seriously. They had both come from severely broken homes :: and both were determined to protect their own children from the same fate.
By the time I met Alison Navarro a couple of months ago :: Naomi Dunford and the cult of Internet Marketing had already destroyed everything that Dave and Alison had worked so hard to build. …

Skeptics mostly like to talk about what it means to be a Skeptic :: it makes it all but impossible for a skeptical fake robot to be a Skeptic. If your skepticalism comes with a t-shirt :: then you’re just a person who likes clubs. I’m fucking skeptical of your dumb clubs.
Still whatever :: t-shirt clubs are better than you sobbing all over me because you’re lonely and all the happy people on the match.com commercials are lies.
Last year I showed up at a t-shirt club party inadvertently while on my way to punch the …

PZ Myers is an evil fucking scumbag.
Maybe not actually. That’s a bit too exciting.
Redundant dirtbag :: or derivative {saggy} dickbag … are probably both more accurate.
The Internets tell me that PZ Myers is an “outspoken atheist” :: which I think probably sounds something like this …

“There is no God … and we can’t let him win.”

I guess outspoken atheists do things like making a Hajj to Kentucky’s The Creation Museum :: where they walk around pointing at things they don’t believe in with a vending-machine-potato-chip fueled sense of superiority. Oh and of course Dinosaur rides :: available even to those with diminished …