Utah

Suck and Swallow

Dirt bag :: piece of shit :: fuck stupid cog in the sick machine … John Swallow … may be set to resign as Utah’s Attorney General.

The Deseret News …

Embattled Utah Attorney General John Swallow has cut a deal with the lieutenant governor’s office to resign in order to avoid facing criminal charges, a source told the Deseret News…
In […]

Herbalife’s Mexican Laundromat

It’s not fucking good to speculate :: best leave that to the empty heads at the cable news networks … cause it’s kinda their jam. But sometimes a fake robot has gotta speculate :: because certain sorts of stories are almost impossible to tell without resorting to this tried and true journalistic formula …

“So-and-so says that what’s-his-name is guilty […]

Emmediate Political Solutions

This Salt Lake City Weekly cover story is fucking amazing :: in a “sticking it to the badguys” kind of way … and fucking depressing … in a “this is how it’s going in our society” kind of way. Bad Company: An ex-con who says he raised funds for John Swallow is nowhere to be found on the AG’s […]

Herbalife vs Black People

You know who loves them some Herbalife? iStockphoto black people … they’re fucking nuts for it.

But iStockphotos don’t have wallets :: or credit cards :: or retirement accounts :: or exploitable fears about future uncertainty … so Herbalife was hoping to increase their pyramid scheme’s reach with real live black people instead.

They started the African-American Initiative :: which is […]

Am I Not A Lawyer?

Every motherfucking horror show on display-archive here :: can be traced back to Mark Shurtleff via a not-fun not-drinking game I like to call … Six Degrees of Rotten Bacon. The Internet has scaled a local corruption type problem :: into an epic global mindraping mega-scam type problem … which The New York Times doesn’t seem to care about.

Eternity […]

Jesus Christ Utah Star

Jeremy Johnson :: The Christ-like Ginger King of the Mormon Mafia … in The New York Times.

It’s good … but it’s bad.
In Utah, a Local Hero Accused
Seems like a pretty fucking annoying headline :: because JJ is so obviously not a hero … but he was in fact a local hero. It says something scary dangerous about the particular […]

Rippln Ripple Rippln Rip

R u Rippln?

One ripple creates another ripple in a beautiful sequence of ever repeating ripples until :: !!boom!! … holy fucking shit you’re so fucking rich right now. You make Warren Buffet look like Ed Dale :: and all you had to do was sign up for a free app … or something … it totally works.

According to the lie-marketing :: Rippln […]

Krispy Kreme Konservatives

Utah’s new {but already fucking corrupt} Attorney General John Swallow is a “real conservative” :: not some fake ass conservative like Mitt Romney … or Hitler. “Real conservatives” make home-craft-sunset-word-art for Republican nominating conventions :: fake conservatives move to Berkeley and get AIDS … simple as that.

… or something.

It’s lucky for Mr. Swallow that he’s a “real conservative” :: […]

Death of a Tax Club

Funny story :: one of Utah’s largest boiler rooms … is located in New York City. That’s the end of the funny part of the story :: I hope you laughed your ass off … because the rest of it is fucking terrible.
The Tax Club :: Earning more than your trust
Or as the FTC :: and the New York […]

Swallowing Johnson

Jeremy Johnson is totally innocent :: just kidding … he was going to accept a plea deal that had him only doing 10 years in prison rather than the 12,000 years he’d need to do in order for his time to be commensurate with his fucked up crimes.

But he’s innocent according to this little propaganda video he had made about his […]