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Salty Droid

Ryan Deiss’ Endometriosis

Ryan Deiss longs to have you inside of him. Well :: not you maybe … but your ideas. Okay :: not so much your ideas as your money. Shove it in … shove it in real good. Daddy likes his dirty money good and dirty.

Ryan worships Jesus by taking from the poor and giving to himself. It’s not in the bible … but fuck it. Right Ryan? No stealing on Sunday … well maybe just this once … or twice … or whatever … forever and ever. Money!!

“Righteous” Ryan’s latest stillborn frauduct :: My Idea Hatchery :: was inspired by the super-useful one-and-only Oprah …

“For years, much like my old buddy (I wish…) Oprah Winfrey, I have made a great living 100% based on my own efforts ALONE and I’ve done really well for myself, but I’ve always had to depend 100% on my ideas, my content and my hard work.

I have for better or worse been “The Star” of my one man show and quite frankly…

I’m tired.

Poor Ryan … he’s so tired of starring in his own one man gay ballet. Being ALONE can really take a toll on a girl. Of course :: several of his major products over the last two years were the ideas and efforts of one Perry Belcher :: fraud felon extraordinaire. And all the people he promotes :: and all those who non-coincidentally promote him back :: with their schedules and launch cycles … and list sharing … and anti-competitive cat crap. Yep :: they’re ALL ALONE … fighting the good fight like Charles “m-effing” Ingalls. Because the truth :: as they say :: is inconvenient.

Here’s how it works :: you give Ryan $500 dollars. You write a business plan with the help of some Deiss e-classes on business plan writing. You present your ideas to him and “his friends” no strings attached.

“The program itself is called the “Idea Hatchery”, because that’s the primary focus…getting your business from the embryo state into profitability. We’ll create a VERY detailed business execution plan that will make the rest of the process a breeze.”

Yeah :: the rest of it will be a breeze. The whole “getting funding” and “actually running a business” parts :: a breeze. It’s the writing an outline part that is so hard. Who knows :: maybe Ryan will fund your plan and only take half or more of the profits. Of course :: maybe not …

“I knew when I made this offer I would be over-run with knuckle heads and nut jobs galore just looking for a handout, so I had to come up with a way to cull-out that element and get to the serious players…

That’s why I now REQUIRE all my potential partners take a 21-day, $500 “bootcamp” to be considered for funding…(This weeds out the slackers and tire-kickers pretty fast…)”

Just weeding out the knuckle heads with a wee little non-refundable $500. And who the fuck knows :: maybe down the road one or two other wee little non-refundable investments might be required if a person really wanted to prove that they weren’t just a tire-kicking slacker. I mean what’s a couple thousand more when you could possibly be buying access to …

” … marketing resources that would take you YEARS to amass, a truck load of cash to invest, access to almost EVERYBODY customer lists and a FORMULA for business success that’s just as proven as Oprah’s.”

His FORMULA is proven bitches! Like publishing a $2,000 get rich from social media product fronted by a felon. Or his series of successfully scammy non-successes. Or a $10,000 “field trip” to his strip mall offices. Or his current office arrangements …

“Here’s the NEW building I just signed 5 year lease on. It’s 6000 sq/ft which frankly is A LOT when you consider that I’m used to working out of my home. I’m confident that the “Idea Hatchery” training will deliver enough new partners and fresh ideas to more than justify the expense.”

Idea Hatchery Officially Hatched Plan

Step 1 :: sign long term lease on commercial real estate

Step 2 :: think of business ideas

Flawless! It’s FORMULAS like that that have created “truck loads” of investment money. And Ryan hasn’t committed the classic ConMan mistake and leveraged himself to the point where the next big hit is fucking mandatory just to keep head above water {á la Death Ray}. No not Ryan … he’s much too righteous.

“I can’t stress just how time-sensitive this really is…”

OMG HURRY!

“You don’t need lawyers and accountants … I have ALL of that already! Remember, I’ll be your partner.”

For sure :: you don’t need no crazy accountants or lawyers. Just give Ryan your money and your ideas NOW without consultation … before it’s too late!

“Obviously this is a huge time commitment on my part (and my team), which is why this “Mentor Program” is limited. If you’re ready to take a quantum leap and FINALLY achieve something you and your family can be proud of, I suggest you click the “Add To Cart” button below before all the spots are taken.”

Your family is disappointed in you. Maybe that can FINALLY change. Let Ryan help you help Ryan … today!

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{error!}

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{fuck!}

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{oh just forget it!}

>> out.

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