The Syndicate.
That’s what they call themselves.  The Syndicate.  Like if they built a fucking tree house {which they probably did} :: then they used a wood burner to carve that name over the extra wide door. The Syndicate. “Look Mom we named our club! It’s a name and a description … we’re super smart like that.”
The Syndicate is a cartel at the center of the get rich quick world of Internet Marketing. Each of the members tries to pass himself off as a freewheeling entrepreneur. An individual rising above :: …

You know what I like?
No … you don’t!
It’s a rhetorical question :: so don’t bother answering you arrogant fucking prick. This blog ain’t about you :: and me :: and Polly PrissyPants sitting down for a lovely cup o’ tea {distinctive Earl Gray!} and having girl chat about our favorite things.
You :: “Didn’t you just love blah blah blah’s collection of summer dresses?”
FakeMe :: “Oh it was absolutely fabulous! The vibrant colors and rich textures really brought the whole thing to life for me. I hope we can expect the same level …

Ryan Deiss’ Perpetual Traffic Formula :: just take a moment to savor the name :: Google that is … I’m talking to you Google GOD DAMN IT. Savor the fucking name!!
“What name?” asks the spirit of Google via a Lily Dale medium.
Great question spirit of Google :: Ryan Deiss’ Perpetual Traffic Formula …
{savoring} {… still savoring} {… savoring dash of smoldering} {and done.}
Ryan Deiss Perpetual Traffic Formula RipOff
{and done for realz.}
Perpetual Traffic Formula REFUNDS
{… resavoring}
Done.
“They” say that 80% of SEO is negging on Google :: keeping her interested but …

Since The Salty Droid’s momentous Hello World twenty glorious months ago :: many an irritated d-bag has opined about the relative value of this site to society. Droid protocol dictates that these flaming turd flingers :: and piss poor propagandists :: be briefly slapped about the face … and then largely ignored. But perhaps that’s unfair :: perhaps more of an effort should be made to reach around to the other side :: and to respond genuinely to genuine criticisms.
The following letter has been remixed and assembled exclusively from the many nega-comments left on this site by …

The interwebs keeps askin’ me …
… is Ryan Deiss a scam?
I feel like I should answer them …
… yes :: yes ma’am.
Done and done.
Okay … maybe just a little more … while we’re already on the subject …
Ryan :: and his gay little cartel of co-conspirators :: are fake-scarcity launching another frauduct destined to enrich a few assholes at the expensive of heaping suffering on the many.  It’s how Ryan helps to make the world a better place. His own version of What Would Jesus Do? :: only in this version …

Fee-fi-fo-fum,
I smell the blood of an Englishman,
Be he alive, or be he dead
I’ll grind his bones to make my bread.
Oh children’s poetry :: how horrifying you are! Bones to bread? He’s already a fucking giant … isn’t that scary enough?
Anywayz :: at long last :: an Englishman. This one’s for you Steven Gerrard {call me!} …
Chris Cardell :: whose look is a mix of teen vampire goth and cold potato soup :: has a small penis.  No I mean a small problem … not a small penis.  That just slipped out … the thing about the small …

One year ago today :: Colleen’s last day.
At 1:43 pacific :: Colleen’s long trip to the mall ended with a three story fall. Colleen’s life was over :: the lives of her family and friends … permanently twisted tragic.
Colleen’s sister Lynn asks in an email to friends and family {and me!} …

“I ask you all to pray for her and remember her today as she lived…not as she died.”

Well we can definitely do part of that here in fake robot land … but we didn’t know Colleen as she lived … and now …

James Arthur Ray was arrested for manslaughter on the morning of February 3rd. Horah!  Good times … good times.
On February 4th :: Ray’s attorney Brad Brian made an appearance on Larry King Live.  He was quite a ChattyKathy. ChattyKathy must have been excited about being on TV. It’s said :: by sayers of things :: that television cameras add ten pounds to big egos :: but Brad seemed to swell by at least twenty-five. Swellings often correlate negatively with decision making skillz.
A PR appearance on national television so shortly after the commencement of a criminal proceeding is inappropriate. Very inappropriate. Walking through the grocery …

James Arthur Ray’s trial for the reckless and horrible manslaughter of three innocent people has been postponed until further notice. That’s great news for Jennifer Horton and Tony Parinello :: who are busy helping Death Ray exploit yet more innocents :: but it’s depressing news for those of us who don’t happen to love evil.
Can’t we just cancel the trial and drown this fuck in the ocean like a wicked witch? Good question :: but no :: we can’t.
Can we at least tase him in the neck and/or balls :: …

“Helping the critics improve their game, write better, and make logical arguments. Introducing CriticWatch.”

Says Pat O’Bryan … via Twitter … to almost no one.
It’s December 2009 and some cool kids {like Connie :: Burned by Fire :: Duff :: Eric :: not-crazy Li_Kuan} are talking shit about Joe Vitale and James Ray via the Twitters. Oh no you didn’t :: Fat Pat to the rescue!! He won’t have the teats from which he suckles tarnished by truth!

“Look forward to line-by-line critiques of the world’s snarkiest blogs, embarrassing personal facts about the writers, and huge fun …