Abundance of Oprah

“Oprah totally loves me now :: she’s getting all my craps for free :: but you should pay enough to upset the normal functioning of your life” :: says Tony Robbins to his email list {basically} …

“You think you have a busy schedule – how about Oprah’s? She showed up at Unleash the Power Within expecting to spend two hours,

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Scamming Two Debbies

My fake secretary Debbie is quite susceptible to scams.

D-bags often call headquarters looking for an opportunity to suck-up to me and my divine stylings in authorship :: but I usually can’t take their calls {because fucking idiots are boring} … and they end up selling Debbie on some blueprint to international bestselling good fortune instead.

I call her names :: like ding-dong and bat-brain :: but that never seems to help …

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Anthony Morrison’s Television Internets

 

Anthony Morrison uses the television to tell people about how HUGE he is on the Interwebs. But most Internet people :: like you people :: have never heard of him. Loving the Internet really cuts into time spent watching shitty 3am infomercials … and fake web-star Morrison has almost no real web presence.

The infomercial is a fake show hosted by Chicken Soup for the Hole dipshit Mark Victor Hansen {pictured here mounting Anthony for reasons I’d better not get into}.

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