Salty Droid >> bleep bloop

Salty Droid


I can’t get scammed by ‘make money’ scammers because I don’t care enough about money. So boring.

“Do you want to make an extra $500 - $1M+ per month?”

Meh. Not really. I mean, sure, I guess, if you’re just going to hand it to me. Otherwise, it sounds like too much work… and I assume there will prolly be mandatory socializing and staff Skype calls? Hard pass. I can already afford all the beer and cheeseburgers I need to survive.

But I do repeatedly get scammed by brash New Yorkers pretending to be stiff-spined advocates of the people.

Eliot Spitzer.

Anthony Weiner.

And now Eric Schneiderman.


I was so convinced, and genuinely inspired, by each of these men … and they all straight Kanye’d me.

Schneiderman was busting on Trump for fraud before the election (the only time for which one can get any credit for busting on Trump). That was a dope track.


Pigs. What an insult that is to pigs. Pigs would never.

Today I’m supposed to choose between Dennis Kucinich and Rich Cordray for Governor in the Ohio primaries. But fuck it. I can’t do it. I’m writing in Kirsten Gillibrand.