Pause

Clint Dempsey scored the first ever American hat-trick in England’s Premier League! It’s no big deal or anything :: unless you love the world’s most popular sport … or you love America {or Texas I guess} … then maybe it’s kinda a big deal.

Sure :: it’s got jack shit to do with this blog … but Jason’s been sick so just fucking deal with it.

Too much TV has been proven by dentists to help with the flu :: and maybe even the plague … so you’re covered if things turn out worse than anticipated. Does that make sense to you right now? Isn’t making sense just like the stupidest?

– Anywayz :: now is my chance to take over #1 on the Modern Warfare 3 leaderboards … what with the fat man from this riddle so politely relinquishing his position.

– Listen to this jolly good BBC Radio special about Internet Marketing … then come back over here and complain about my tagline some more.

– Heather Armstrong is getting divorced :: now how am I supposed to know how to be a mommy … or more importantly … how to be a mommy blogger {a totally real career opportunity}?

– The fake robot wants to listen to some more Utah telephone salesman complaining about how much their hypocrite bosses suck donkey balls. If you’ve ever thought about biting back … now would be a good moment to ping me at any of the places I can be pinged {pass it on}.

Hey Mark Shurtleff :: dream about me you corrupt piggy.

Big stuff coming.

>> bleep bloop