Salty Droid >> bleep bloop

Salty Droid

Conspiracy to Destroy


After a lifetime of epic grift :: serial huckster Kevin Trudeau is finally in jail … rotting like he always was. KT got ten years for failing to comply with some government paperworks he signed ten years ago as a punishment for the bullshit he’d been pulling the ten years previous to that. Hundreds of millions of dollars have been brutally sucked from the sad in the meantime :: and basically … nobody gives a fuck.

It wouldn’t be surprising to learn that the total revenues from Trudeau’s life of scamjobery had topped a billion dollars. This book :: that book … whatever … the books don’t matter. It’s about cartels of badguys buying {preselected for sadness} people in bulk from media/info companies :: and then trading those people around until they become empty vessels … robbed of their money … and often of their sense of self.

The media :: the government :: and the courts … will all tell you a different story though. A much less complicated story :: disconnected from the hard problems of reality …

“He is a habitual liar and a fraudster,” Assistant U.S. Attorney April Perry said.

As a result of the size of the fraud and Trudeau’s two previous felony convictions, federal sentencing guidelines called for 20 to 25 years in prison, a range that Guzman said he thought was “appropriate.” However, he eventually agreed with prosecutors who said a 10-year term was sufficient since – unlike in many fraud cases – no one who bought Trudeau’s book was financially ruined.

Just a little bit :: totally … wrong.


Anywayz :: according to Leonard Coldwell :: one of Trudeau’s most pathetic and debauched former minions … it is I the fake robot :: rather than he the fake doctor … who will be following KT to the slammer. “Conspiracy to destroy the grounds of a business” is a federal crime :: the NotDoctor keeps telling me by pseudo-proxy … having not yet developed sufficient man-sack to speak to me directly.

“Conspiracy to destroy the grounds of a business” is not a crime of course :: or a real thing even … it’s just creepy old man babbling. And what business? Is swimming in Kevin Trudeau’s wake with your mouth wide open a business?

But still :: Lenny’s got his tiny little mind set on it … so off he goes!

Step one in Leonard Coldwell’s “The Only Answer to SaltyDroid Goes 2 Jail” :: is using a personal injury attorney to bring a defamation case against me for some shit that someone else said … in a state where I no longer live … well after the statute of limitations has run {you’ve only got one year to bring a suit in most states}. As opening moves go :: it ranks right up there with trading your queen for a bag of Skittles … and replacing all your pawns with hand carved cat turds.

The not doctor and his hack lawyer were not able to properly locate and serve me with the required paperwork :: so our @Anna went to the courthouse and fetched them for us … like the administrative hero she so often is.

Coldwell vs Droid

It’s pretty easy to tell that none of the posts attached to that suit are mine :: because …

a) Omri wrote them … duh.

b) There are ads for fucking scams on them :: which makes me want to furiously chew up rusty nails … and spit out molten shrapnel.

Lenny took immediately to the Facebooks to boast about his SaltyDroid suing bravery …

So funny he is begging my lawyer for mercy as I understand his email showing how scared he is.

Just a little bit :: totally … wrong.

I heard he is hiding at his cheap home sh..g his pants and biting his finger nails and wishes he would never messed with me.


I wish he’d never been born though. I wish I’d never seen a photo of his pervy mustache. I wish one of the bulging veins on his massive forehead would burst :: and an alien would slither out and chew his stupid face off. I wish the government would arrest groups of scammers in groups.

He also offered to talk to my lawyers and wanted to saddle this outside the courts and take his defamatory post down. LOL

I could give him the benefit of the doubt and call him delusional :: but I won’t … he’s just a big ol’ liar. In actual {fun} fact :: less than two weeks after my first highly prickly correspondence with Leonard Coldwell’s personal injury attorney Dennis J. Kellogg … Mr. Kellogg made a motion to withdraw from the case.

no more lawyer

LOL :: lol :: LOL

Suddenly :: Lenny’s boasting started to sound more like run-on sentence panicking …

Accusing someone of having committed a crime that he was never ever even officially accused of or stating in public that the greatest therapist of our times does not have a legitimate Doctor degree etc Oh honey puff - we and our lawyers will have such a field day with you in court.( and jail) Nothing will be left - Look at Trudeau he messed with us and see what happened?

I wouldn’t exactly say I’d accused Coldwell of having “committed a crime.” I’d say I’d carefully hedged and equivocated as to the criminality of his darkness :: but it seems he considers it a crime … which I think I’ll log as a confession.

Leonard Coldwell :: the greatest therapist of our times :: then instructed Dennis Kellogg :: the greatest attorney of our times … not to speak to me again. It would be fun to sue me while not having to speak to me :: because I really am intolerable … but you can’t. When you sue me :: you grant me all sorts of rights I wouldn’t normally have … like for instance … you have to stop ignoring me and answer my damn questions. So … thanks for that.

Oh yeah the loser has not even money for a lawyer and wants to represent himself. He says he is a lawyer and thinks he can represent himself in Federal Court? Hmmm let’s see how that works for him.

Hmmm :: yeah … let’s fucking see.

Leonard was never going to be able to find {and properly serve} me :: because one of the {too many} gaps in SaltyDroid 2013 … stemmed from Jason moving from Chicago to Columbus. It’s been pretty nice :: almost a full year totally off the creep radar … my address not spattered all over an Internet populated by d-bags who wish I was dead. But I didn’t want to see Lenny deprived of his big opportunity to pay someone to have a writing contest with me … so I voluntarily appeared and filed some motions of my own.

dismissing coldwell

sanctioning coldwell

You know what’s fun about legal writing? You can’t be sued for anything you say :: so it’s much easier to say what you need to say. It’s the old fashioned way to do what I’ve been trying to do in the new fashioned way.

Six years ago Matt Bacak blocked me on Twitter because he couldn’t take a joke … and the idea for what this site was to become was flash born. Use the power :: the enormity :: the connectedness :: the simplicity :: and the lingo … of the Internet {plus jokes} … to fight back against serial victimizers. It’s a pretty great fucking idea if you ask me {or anyone else with any class} :: but as is so often the case with pretty great fucking ideas … it was well ahead of its time. The fake robot is all but banned from the American Internet :: currently hanging on by a single disintegrating thread … while Matt Bacak tweets/scams on unabated … and Jason becomes increasingly despondent about the implacability of evil.

It’s time for a change.

It’s time :: I think {after much thinking} … to surrender the new in favor of doing the old {in a new way}.

{Not} Doctor Doctor Doctor Doctor Lenny Coldwell PHD-bag :: short :: bald :: and stinking of hilarious desperation … is trying to fucking pretend at intimidating me.

#nothappening #areyouhighrightnow #oops #honeypuff

But all he’s done :: other than completely embarrass himself … is give us this tiny timely preview of the near future.

Scamworld wouldn’t sue me … so I’m gonna sue Scamworld.



Mr. Coldwell has until April 17th to find a new lawyer for me to slap around :: or he’ll have to reply to my “fake wanna be lawyer” motions himself … “let’s see how that works for him.”

>> bleep bloop