copywrong-chris

Via the colorful InBox of The Salty Droid ::

Date: Aug 12, 2009
From: “Lara Townsend” lifetimemarketingsuccess.help@gmail.com
CC: legal@lifetimemarketingsuccess.com

To the owner of SaltyDroid.info:

It has come to my attention that you are illegally using a picture from my blog on your site:

http://www.saltydroid.info/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/not-funny.jpg

It appears on this page:
http://www.saltydroid.info/the-floportunity-of-a-lifetime/

The graphic was stolen from this original web page, owned by my company:
http://www.mlmblog.com/archives/2009/03/3-time-saving-tools-to-streamline-your-business-life.html

As you did NOT obtain permission to use my graphic, it’s fully copyrighted and you are using it in violation of US and International copyright law, please remove that picture *immediately* (within the next 24 hours) from your site.

Thank you for your prompt attention to this.

Sincerely,
Chris Zavadowski

cc: Framme Law Firm, Richmond, VA

From: The Salty Droid

Dear Chris,

Thank you for your timely correspondence. The Robotic Committee on CatCrap has reviewed your claim and decided :: BiteMe! :: Wait … I shouldn’t have said that … it wasn’t very professional and I apologize. But seriously …….. BiteMe!

Sincerest Fake-Regards,
Salty Reginald Droid IV Esq.

cc: Jesus of Nazareth
cc: Prince
cc: Pre-Paid Legal

The sad thing about threats like this is that they work :: 99 of 100 people would immediately relent {robots not included}.

Mr. Zavadowski has no fucking idea what he’s talking about :: Yet he carefully crafts a tone that sounds definitive :: He uses conclusory words with scary connotations {like illegal and stolen} :: He pulls an arbitrary time line str8 from his ass :: He even appeals to the overwhelming power of “International Law” {clearly someone who doesn’t understand the intransigence of U.S. nationalism when it comes to matters of perceived sovereignty :: Not that anyone else does either because that’s a completely wonkish sentence and I’m just showing off}.

Chris says he’s cc’ing the Framme Law Firm :: But the actual email address on the cc is just to a box called “legal” on his own web server.  The Framme Law Firm is the Virgina provider for Pre-Paid Legal :: A service which gives you access to basic legal services {wills, simple contracts, speeding tickets} for as little as $26 a month. Complex copyright litigation for unsympathetic plaintiffs who have suffered no damages isn’t a part of the package.

Guess what else I can do without even coming close to violating your “copyrights” girlfriend?

This ::

banner of fools

The Internet’s #1 Blog :: Shocking! I’m glad you told us it was number one because that is not the number I would have guessed.

and this::

King Coach

My fake vote for Coach of the Year went to Alex Ferguson :: But I guess I can see how it might have gone to Chris the D-Bag from Virginia.

Despite what the Bastards and Bullies might tell you :: Content creators don’t have absolute exclusive rights to things put into the public sphere.  If you have a picture of yourself and a notorious FELON :: You are both blind drunk :: You have an ice bucket on your head and the Felon has underwear that read “Twitter Rockstar” on his :: Don’t put that shit up on a “blog” which is just a content free sales funnel to various dubious info products.  If you do :: then when a truth telling robot decides to use your picture to illustrate a running theme about the duplicitousness of an entire “industry” :: you won’t be able to do anything but whine like an ignorant baby.

However, I did put that photo up in a rush on a very busy morning :: And it didn’t meet my usual quality standards :: So while even my death in the streets wouldn’t mean the removal of that photo from my blog :: I have added a cooler border and a demon.  You’re welcome. {link}

Don’t speak to me again Chris {you punk ass fool} :: And tell your BFF Perry Belcher that you saw your “fully copyrighted” picture all over the “broke ass computers” in my “broke ass house.”

>> bleep bloop