Death Ray Speaketh :: Episode 2
Do you know what you need to do {assuming you’re still alive} to get into the “higher upper echelons of people on this planet?”
No? :: me neither! Kinda doesn’t sound like a real fucking thing. But if I humored the possibility that it was a real fucking thing … then I’d go out on a limb and say you should try to be born there. Be born in a rich country :: to a rich family :: horah! … please accept my congratulations for making it into the “higher upper echelons” … you deserved it.
James Arthur Ray presents a less statistically based approach in his latest still birthed video turd …
– a purpose {like torture :: ego tripping :: or money at any cost}
– a vision {like of yourself as a unstoppable god}
– a coach {like Carlo Ancelotti … Chelsea Sucks!}
– a practice {like lying :: and LGATing}
– a mentor {like Tony Robbins :: or Satan}
– a group {cause manipulating individuals is too hard to be profitable}
– a retreat {death optional}
… bullshit.
Episode 2 of Death Ray Speaketh :: once again a substantial improvement over the unoriginal original … and for a fair price.
>> bleep bloop
-------------More fabulously hilarious writing ::
- Death Ray Speaketh James Arthur Ray :: ball-less wind bag :: can’t...
- Sean Stephenson :: Doing it in the But Size matters :: in certain things … like illegal...
- The Secret Harmonic Death Closings Sheila Polk is Yavapai’s first female County Attorney :: she’s...
- Death Ray’s Mind Games James Arthur Ray must be putting all his attention...
- Death Ray Trial Omegas :: April 26th – Fake robots in mirror :: http://flic.kr/p/9BWRqX {above}...
:: read one now before you die of stupid.
Interestingly, there doesn’t appear to be ANY contact information on James Ray’s web site, except for a p.r. contact. His organization now appears pretty defunct.
[Reply]
Good one. Actually there’s a field under the original even funnier video on his web site (sorry salty, but I don’t see how you could have made that any more tragically comical than it already was), where you can enter your contact info to get him to send you his updates FREE!! to “Receive ongoing videos to help you create the life you deserve.”
For example:
email: Your@mouth.com
First Name: Spews
Last Name: Turds
Just a suggestion. The more the merrier.
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Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
LOSER!! ::
-26
[Reply]
jackrabbit Reply:
April 1st, 2010 at 9:46 pm
Hey, it’s the voice of LEEKUAN’s “reason.” You should figure out what’s// wrong// with// your// Keyboard. Not that everybody couldn’t figure out who you are from your misfired-brain rants anyway.
Sounds like Salty really got your knickers in a knot.
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Detached observer Reply:
April 1st, 2010 at 10:01 pm
@the voice of reason,
At least be interesting if you are going to be wildly off-topic.
C’mon show that you have some chops. I got bored immediately.
[Reply]
SD Reply:
April 1st, 2010 at 10:43 pm
@vor
noam chomsky noam chomsky noam chomsky :: amy goodman!
eat it!
ps che guevara and grass fed beef
[Reply]
AnnAustin Reply:
April 2nd, 2010 at 2:55 pm
@SD, Nice. I’ll match that with some composting, solar power, CFLs and a rain garden.
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jackrabbit Reply:
April 4th, 2010 at 10:01 pm
I too have to admit, my abhorrence of Death Ray is completely grounded in my leftard pinko mentality. Had it not been for this tragic affliction of unthinking doctrinaire socialism I may well have entered the death lodge myself. It’s the only thing that really could have saved me.
[Reply]
Carlos Reply:
April 1st, 2010 at 11:02 pm
@the voice of reason, Dude, before you have a stroke, chill. Imagine for a moment that someone actually shared your train of thought. And then you started rambling like you just did, fuck this and fuck that, blah, blah, blah…even someone who agreed with you would think you were batty. I’m assuming you are actually a grown adult, and that’s quite an assumption based on your tirade. Seriously, man, chill before you have a damn stroke.
[Reply]
SD owning VOR Reply:
April 2nd, 2010 at 12:34 am
VOR avatar: http://img361.imageshack.us/img361/1088/vorownage.jpg
[Reply]
VOR's Starbucks Barista Reply:
April 2nd, 2010 at 1:54 pm
When are you coming back for your 9th cup of the day baby?
[Reply]
Hey VOR/FGayCT – were you born a douche-bag? Or did you grow into the role? This ridiculous post of yours has no bearing whatsoever on the topic SD is currently lampooning, so why would you waste your obviously well-compensated time composing a comment on it? Would you please just crawl under a rock somewhere (maybe with LeeKuan/JoeLarch) and talk to yourself? Your spewing of bullshit here is tiresome and boring.
WINNER!! ::
+13
[Reply]
Is that Megan with Death Ray in the still photo?
Just looking at her frenzied, manic grin makes my face hurt.
WINNER!! ::
+7
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Joe Reply:
April 1st, 2010 at 10:57 pm
Yeah, they look like VERY good friends, don’t they? “Josh, would you run out and come back in a couple of hours with some champagne?”
WINNER!! ::
+10
[Reply]
Joe Reply:
April 1st, 2010 at 10:58 pm
Oh, and what are those bags over there heads? “Mini” sweat lodges?
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Jean D Reply:
April 2nd, 2010 at 12:32 am
@Joe, I had seen those pics on flickr.com.Apparently these were “personal statement hats”. People paid thousands of dollars for this event,yet Ray was so damn greedy,he could only come up with some paper grocery bags,crayons and ribbon for a cheesy pre-school level activity.Now that’s enlightening.
WINNER!! ::
+12
[Reply]
Hippo Reply:
April 2nd, 2010 at 7:50 am
@Jean D,
I’m delighted to hear the back-story on thoe bag hats. I was going to make some sort of snarky guess as to what they were, but the truth is funnier than anything I could have come up with.
[Reply]
hatman Reply:
April 2nd, 2010 at 11:13 am
@Hippo, @Jean & @Joe…
Those hats are from Dick’s Last Resort – a douchey low brow restaurant in San Diego’s gaslamp quarter… people dig it because the beers are big and the wait staff makes fun of you.
Obviously these dick turds were easy fodder…
I wonder if they were lunching there while Colleen was on her “spiritual adventure” (ie. hurling herself to her death just down the street at Horton Plaza)?
[Reply]
Jean D Reply:
April 2nd, 2010 at 3:40 pm
Hey Salty Droid,the video is beyond Genius!God,I laughed so hard.Thank you. DeathRay’s list is flipping crazy!When he mentions having a “purpose” I can’t help but think of Navin(Steve Martin)in The Jerk. Couldn’t resist tweeting this: @JamesRay#”Steve Martin/Navin in The Jerk found his Special Purpose!His was hard,therefore easy to find but yours,Jimmy,is only hard-to-find.”
Hippo Reply:
April 4th, 2010 at 9:16 am
@Jean D,
That is some pretty snazzy artwork. What do you suppose those drawings represent?
[Reply]
Jean D Reply:
April 4th, 2010 at 10:16 am
@Hippo, Oh,surely,dear,is it not obvious how this creates wealth? Brown paper bags are the foundation of universal principles that take you to the upper eschelon mindset. If you were already at that level you would see the power in the drawings. Makes sense,doesn’t it? Do need a shift in your thinking? Perhaps a mentor or coach,aka James Ray,can help you get it.Start by reviewing the seven principles listed above. Then sign up for the ongoing videos. You owe it to yourself,Hippo.
[Reply]
Hippo Reply:
April 4th, 2010 at 11:18 am
@Jean D,
Um, I think I’m going to go look at pictures of Anderson Cooper instead.
stoic Reply:
April 4th, 2010 at 12:45 pm
@Hippo,
Watch those lower echelon mindsets, even if AC does bat for the other side.
Too much attachment to the earthly delights can prevent you from hearing the ethereal harmonics of the brown paper bag. :)
Jean D Reply:
April 2nd, 2010 at 12:20 am
@Hippo, Yes.That’s little Miss M Fr.and her drunk spank me harder and choke me while you’re at it Daddy James.
[Reply]
omikse Reply:
April 3rd, 2010 at 7:36 am
@Jean D,
In the pic of Ray…did you notice the middle finger of his right hand?..he seems to be pointing at it with the index finger of his left hand…..is that what he feels for his “followers” ?…..
[Reply]
babzilicious Reply:
April 3rd, 2010 at 4:35 pm
@omikse, @JeanD @Hippo Oh those pics, those pics! Ladies I might have to break out some Jack Daniels, beef jerky, and a pack of smokes at this rate, and forget the lemonade and cookies!
James Arthur Ray. Bless him, poor man. He soooooooo wants to be Tony Robbins – sporting that same look with the goatee and the tan.
And Megan – I’m with you on that one, Hippo. That’s one exhaustion-causing smile.
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For those of us who actually know the Droid, I don’t think anyone in a million years would have ever thought our little Jason would be called a Marxist, anti-capitalist, pro-proletariat liberal. Today is a day to remember – although I wish the post had been made on Wednesday, when the Droid was undoubtedly celebrating Cesar Chavez day by listening to Amy Goodman and reading Paulo Freire.
[Reply]
SD Reply:
April 2nd, 2010 at 12:11 pm
@SocialistSalty ::
Being called a socialist is the first step toward getting on the faculty of some shitty jr. college where you can totally phone it in. Onward!
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Junior college – why not critical legal studies at GW?
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Extremely funny, Droid. I’m almost looking forward to the next one. That bizarre smile is the perfect ending to these vids. If my memory serves me rightly, he had just said “…and I’m looking forward to my day in court”, hesitated a moment to wonder if just how fake it sounded, then decided to attempt a smile, with that result.
This was just uploaded:
http://apps.supremecourt.az.gov/docsYAV/Cases/State%20of%20Arizona%20vs%20James%20Arthur%20Ray/03-31-2010%20DSCLOSURE-3RD%20SUPPLEMENTAL%20DISCLOSURE.pdf
Is point 2 just a legal formality, or is it another sign that they are open to prosecuting more than one scumbag?
“2. All statements of the defendant and of any person who will be tried with him”
[Reply]
Yakaru Reply:
April 3rd, 2010 at 2:28 am
…And exhibits for the prosecution will include several documents “taken from Michele Fredrickson’s backpack” – all specifically concerning sweat lodge victims. WTF? It sounds a lot like she was trying to hide them and got sprung. (???)
[Reply]
Jamo Reply:
April 3rd, 2010 at 4:31 am
@Yakaru, I think megan should be tried with him given all the covering-up she has done.
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Good work as usual, Droid. And now I can’t get that song, ‘Coin-Operated Boy’ out of my head. But that’s okay. It’s a pretty cool song.
[Reply]
SD Reply:
April 3rd, 2010 at 1:52 pm
@CC ::
Yeah :: it really sticks with ya. But it’s great for singing while you dance around the kitchen doing the robot.
[Reply]
Bryan Neuman Reply:
April 3rd, 2010 at 10:27 pm
@SD, I’m okay with having that song stuck in my head as well, great work SD! Making him do that little dance is priceless.
[Reply]
All these D-Bags have a very strange OBSESSION with their own kind. They all exhibit an obsessive compulsive behaviour second to none.
[Reply]
jojo Reply:
April 4th, 2010 at 7:19 am
@anonymous, Yes i see that the wanker from oz Schirmer was attending Tony Robbins for the 9th time. Now wouldntya think that you’d get it by at least the second. They certainly do seem to have an obsession with one another and I think they like to go to each others events to find out what else they can steal not to mention the jealousy thing. They are compulsively obsessed with themselves.
[Reply]
I had nightmares of a James Ray carnie chasing me-his head & neck tilting & jerking. He had glow in the dark teeth & a monstorous grin.
I loved the song..added their video to my YouTube playlist. Can’t get the chorus out of my head.
[Reply]
Great video, Mr Salty, with an appropriate soundtrack.
Death Ray has posted his infintely more untruthful version on YouTube if anyone wants to leave a message there. Don’t forget the overall like/dislike rating at the top, directly bebeath the vid.
[Reply]
Jean D Reply:
April 5th, 2010 at 5:21 pm
@stoic, Someone keeps flagging anti-Ray comments on his YouTube video as Spam and hiding them. I’ve been unflagging and opening them back up.
[Reply]
stoic Reply:
April 6th, 2010 at 12:35 am
@Jean D,
Yes, I’ve been doing that too. I think it must be someone from JRI because it is the comments that give facts about the victims, the deaths and injuries, the fact that he is charged with 3 counts of manslaughter that are mainly being flagged as spam.
This is someone or more than one person who does not want those incontrovertible facts, which would give pause to any reasonable person, to influence the faithful followers.
Its probably DeathRay himself, he hasn’t much else to do sitting in his mansion with his business on hold.
[Reply]
More docs released http://www.kpho.com
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okay here is the doc link http://www.kpho.com/download/2010/0113/22221286.pdf
[Reply]
Jean D Reply:
April 5th, 2010 at 5:43 pm
@wondering why, the Christina in these interviews is actually Kristina Bivins,one of DeathRay’s biggest SanFran based supporters who’s made statements to the media applauding him.Both she and Hermia Nelson(Ray’s “girlfriend” mentioned in news reports who was in attendance at his bail hearings)were both severely damaged in death lodges,yet are currently enabling him and following on his funky fungus heels like obedient little bitches,uh,female dogs.
Speaking of DeathRay groupies,you know I ain’t one to gossip,buuuut,a reliable Twitter source has told me several women have approached her with stories of how Ray is quite challenged in the intimacy department. No details were provided,but the source claims all agree: DeathRay has some very serious shortcomings.
[Reply]
wondering why Reply:
April 5th, 2010 at 6:56 pm
@Jean D,
That wouldn’t surprise me at all..
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It appears to me that James Ray (and other people mentioned on this blog) get so greedy that they lose all sense of responsibility and care. When something so tragic goes wrong the first thing they think of is saving their own skin NOT helping others or rectifying the wrong that it appears they have done. It is tragic indeed when people get so greedy that they lose all sense of care of other human beings. The danger of letting James Ray continue in this sort of business to me (and that goes for the other people mentioned on this blog) is that if they have the ability to take things so far once then they can certainly do it again and that should never be allowed to happen. Just thinkin…
[Reply]
Has anyone seen this?It’s a podfeed of Ray plugging his YouTube videos and has a link to a Frank Kern video on the page. Ran across it while looking for a listing for Harmonic Wealth Weekend 2010. Some girl tweeted she’d been to an event in Chicago “last night” and is looking forward to the July 17-18 event.Maybe she meant 2009? WTH? Can Ray be selling himself if he’s being sued for owing money? http://www.podfeed.net/episode/My+Birthday+Surprise/1495839
[Reply]
White Rabbit Reply:
April 6th, 2010 at 1:26 pm
@Jean D, The marching band on his birthday thing happened in November 2008.
[Reply]
Jean D Reply:
April 6th, 2010 at 6:58 pm
@White Rabbit, Yes, I saw that. But if you scroll down,you can download his newest videos, as well as the bullshit “update on Sedona”, and other podcasts and videos. I personally don’t want to download them to find out if they’re free or if they lead people to other products for purchase,but if he is selling,he’s got a lot of nerve,considering the exorbitant amounts of money owed to people.
[Reply]
stoic Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 2:29 am
@Jean D,
I can safely assure you, Jean D, that even stuff offered as ‘free’ from these types is part of a lure to get more customers spending more money down the road.
There are quite a lot of sites where Ray has this free advertorial stuff on offer, most have blocked them for the moment although the pages are still up. You can be sure they will be immediately unblocked if Death Ray somehow beats this rap.
In the equation of dead customers against continuing revenue, the money wins almost every time.
[Reply]
Super best fantastic offer!
Er, well, sort of.
This has appeared in my inbox:
Title: Your next Factor for a Fulfilling Life is Ready
Main email:
“Dear Subscriber,
Hopefully you’ve been enjoying and benefitting from the videos on the “Seven Factors for a Fulfilling Life” …and I trust you’ve been getting out your pad and pen and giving your Purpose and Vision some serious thought.
In the next clip I share with you the importance of Factor 3: A Mentor; and I’d be willing to bet that I have some insights into this that you haven’t heard before.
So take a few moments out of your day just for you… and check it out. You deserve it, and you’ll be glad you did.
http://www.JamesRay.com
Move love and respect,
James Arthur Ray
P.S. I have a new partnership with Business Broadcasting for a new live and interactive internet radio show called “Living in the Flow” starting in May. Stay tuned for updates and information
P.P.S. What topic would you like me to discuss on my new show? What question do you need answered? Send your input to LivingintheFlow@live.com and I’ll be sure to cover your topic and answer your questions.?
”
Hmm. Living in the flow. Of the toilet bowl, perhaps?
[Reply]
stoic Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 4:45 pm
@Nikki,
Perhaps we should all send some input to LivingintheFlow@live.com. I’ve got some questions for Death Ray:
Why did you run off and abandon your injured and dying customers?
Why are you avoiding responsibility for your crimes
Why are you still soliciting money for events you cannot hold?
Why aren’t you refunding advance payments made for those events?
Where has all the money gone? What is the name of your off-shore bank?
Who do you think is going to take life advice from a fuck-up like you?
[Reply]
omikse Reply:
April 9th, 2010 at 2:49 pm
@stoic,
sent it off already…used some of your questions and a few of my own….
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Are there actually people STILL buying anything from James Ray??? If a non educated hillbilly murderer (who used to choke cats for fun as a kid allegedly) from Oklahoma can become the world’s foremost expert on wealth and happiness in the good old USA then anything is possible.
A homeless bum on the street has more credibility than James Ray in the success department.
[Reply]
Jean D Reply:
April 9th, 2010 at 1:39 pm
@fjk;lkfwe, Hey,dear,I’m proudly from Oklahoma,OKC,am educated & from generations of scholars and successful landowners.Do your research and you’ll see many famous people hail from the Sooner State. They are an integral part of American history and culture.That said…
Death Ray is not “from” Oklahoma and is not a hillbilly,not even a country boy. Daddy Ray was/is a shyster,salesman who served as a preacher in a Pentecostal Church of God in Tulsa.I haven’t learned where they came from originally,but JAR was born in Honolulu. During the 60s and 70s,Tulsa was a place of tremendous wealth,opulence & culture,which probably made Jimmy feel “poor”.One man has been quoted as saying the Rays were middle-class by all outward appearances,and even had James had more than some of the other kids.
Death Ray is clearly the product of religious abuse from his con-artist father,who most likely forced him to attend long,crazy church services where the congregants were tithing 10% of their income,and probably giving him more, due to successful cajoling and well-honed preaching techniques. Pentecostal churches have traditionally been a hotspot for scammers.My Grandma became Pentecostal,for some reason,and our mother was constantly telling her to stop sending money to those snake-oil peddling radio evangelists.
One of these d-bags,A.A.Allen,hawked an “acne cure”which Grandma ordered for my cousin. When it arrived,I examined the little tin can it came in,replete with elephant and palm tree designs,and stared at the capsules inside,supposedly filled with “an oil from deep within the African jungle”. As an adult,I know these were nothing more than Vitamin A capsules,which Grandma paid over $10 for in 1970! Note:Vitamin A can cure skin problems, but is toxic in large doses.Real responsible marketing,Brother Allen.
Many Pentecostals are wonderful people,as was my Grandma,but their practices can be over the top. Only one time I saw inside a “Holy Roller” service from a side door at the church.There were people stomping their feet,shouting,and getting “slain” in the Spirit. That’s when the preacher butts the palm of his hand against someone’s forehead and they fall back into someone’s arms,then lie contorting and writhing on the floor for a while. Some of these churches practice snake handling and feet washing,and some don’t allow females to cut their hair,wear makeup or pants,and require subservience to males. All Pentecostals believe in faith healing or “laying on hands”,though not all of them completely reject medical treatment.
With the oil collapse of the early 80s,few deep pockets were left in Tulsa into which the Rays could continue sliding their slimy hands. Also,the Bible Belt is not the most ideal place for developing alternative spiritual followings,though Oklahoma has had its share of small-time faux gurus. What else was a junior college drop-out salesman named James Ray to do? The answer is obvious:disguise himself as a New Age,self-help leader and move to California in search of greener($)pastures,and,ultimately,creating his very own Steinbeckian tragedy.
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Just read up on LGAT’s and did a Google search. Came across this site http://forum.rickross.com/read.php?4,31129
It lists LGATs and curiously enough Robert Bly came up.
* New Warrior Training (1986, Robert Bly from Sterling Institute, Ron
Hering, Bill Kauth, Rich Tosi)
Is this the same Robert Bly that’s hailed as a genius and successful copywriter?
[Reply]
Anthony Mahavick Reply:
April 17th, 2010 at 9:37 pm
@questions,
They’re different guys.
The copywriter is http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_W._Bly. His site is http://www.bly.com.
The LGAT guy is http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Bly. His site is http://www.robertbly.com/.
TR
[Reply]
questions Reply:
April 18th, 2010 at 7:37 am
@Anthony Mahavick, thank for clearing this up. For a while I thought “here is another one, when will it all stop”.
Has anyone heard of George Jenkins the shining knight of copywriting?
Or Darryl Klepper of SEO Super Powers?
Or Billy Cubbingham of affiliate marketing?
Or Janice Pinkston the queen of Internet marketing?
Funny…me neither…just made them up. That’s what it seems like to me whenever I hear all these names these Internet marketing and business people brag about whom they’ve written for or who they studied with who’s ass they wiped for credibility rights.
It’s like “Hey buy from me because I made coffee for 3 years for Joe Schmuck who’s the absolute God of SEO copywriting and just made 9 million dollars in 9 seconds on 9/9/09″. Then you find out Joe Schmuck is a bipolar hillbilly living in a popup RV camper in the backwoods of Mississippi with less than $20 for the week left in his sock stash under his mattress.
[Reply]
Raymond Reply:
April 17th, 2010 at 11:52 pm
@questions, I have no doubt that BOB Bly, copywriter, would have nothing to do with that stuff. Like Anthony said, they are two different people.
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The latest in Death Ray’s continuing series of shill videos, where he jovially encourages us to form a mastermind group although the implication is clearly to get followers to join his own thumb ring group.
Comments are open at the link below (YouTube) if anyone is inclined to air their conflicting opinions:
[Reply]
i think i just peed myself. THAT was funny. thanks. (of course when i think about how much money i gave him, i think i throw up in my mouth)
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