Kim and Sandy :: Episode 2
Kim and Sandy :: it’s a love for the fucking ages.
What is it that makes them so compatible? What is the seed of their blossom?
They have much in common:
- wishing they were taller
- love of bouffant hairstyles and androgyny
- getting pleasure from the suffering of others
- wasting money like empty headed morons
- passion for Mickey Mouse / Naruto slash fiction
- helping drive people into poverty
But these are but the triflings of the mortal coil :: inadequately voiced. A love this flamingly eternal could never truly be expressed via sarcastic bullet points :: or super sweet comic strips.
Video perhaps?
>> bleep bloop
-------------
More fabulously hilarious writing ::
- Kim and Sandy :: Episode 1 Andy Jenkins really wishes that he was Frank Kern....
- Kim and Sandy :: Episode 3 Nothing lasts forever. {that’s what she said.} Love is...
- Kim and Sandy :: Episode 4 The Dead Kim Jong-il :: the great leader of the comrades...
- Death Ray Speaketh :: Episode 2 Do you know what you need to do {assuming...
- BackStabbing on Black Insert Tape 2 … … discuss {try not to...
:: read one now before you die of stupid.
It looks like Kim and Sandy have something to announce:
http://snipurl.com/x3m94
[Reply]
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
LOSER!! ::
-4
[Reply]
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
LOSER!! ::
-12
[Reply]
Andy Jenkins Fat hooker Reply:
June 5th, 2010 at 7:43 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
LOSER!! ::
-7
[Reply]
SD Reply:
June 21st, 2010 at 2:32 pm
I voted this down :: I encourage others to do the same. It’s fucking with my digital feng shui … sorry fat people … but you don’t go well with my robot tea and cake.
[Reply]
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
LOSER!! ::
-39
[Reply]
shut up bitch Reply:
June 4th, 2010 at 11:53 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
LOSER!! ::
-7
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stoic Reply:
June 5th, 2010 at 5:56 am
@the voice of reason,
Take this criticism as the awesome help it can be for you, “voice of reason,” —you are seriously missing the point.
All sales are made on the basis of emotion–in the battle between emotion and reason, emotion will always prevail. Your total reliance on ‘reason’ shows that your brain has atrophied, probably due to age and the erroneous assumption that you already know it all–an entirely reasonable but still erroneous assumption, based on emotion, that you have to be right by virtue of age, authority, status and ego.
Move over, old man, watch and learn. There is still an active brain cell in there somewhere–make use of it.
[Reply]
Professor Venkman Reply:
June 5th, 2010 at 11:46 am
Poor “Voice of Unreasonable.” Interesting to see what he DOES, and not what he says. He just HAS to keep coming back here, because his life is so shallow, so empty, and so utterly meaningless without the guidance of this blog. VOuR must come here every single day, if not twice every hour or more.
We are his lifeline to the world, and his psychotic “protestations” are nothing but a futile front to hide the mental illness that consumes him. That, and his biggest fear, which is that he will one day be locked in the same room with Sandy Jenkins and 650 pounds of burritos, and totally inadequate ventilation.
[Reply]
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
LOSER!! ::
-5
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ohh fuck…that was brilliant…..nice job matching Cartman’s voice to Kim’s mouth movement…and the slow motion effect was hilarious…it really sold the lust Kim showed for Jenkins….
PS – that “ominous” sound byte you used from 37-40…I know you used it a few times….I still for the life of me can’t figure out what it is…but man…that sound is sweet…
[Reply]
SD Reply:
June 5th, 2010 at 4:21 pm
@_cartman_ ::
It’s an iMovie sound … “Drone Dark Suspense” … and it’s the theme song of all the “stars” of this play.
[Reply]
_cartman_ Reply:
June 8th, 2010 at 12:36 am
@SD,
cool…thanks…I was able to find a very similar drone sound on the audio site I use….
I just went to check out iMovie…it’s pretty cool, real user friendly….lots of ready to use themes and “pre-made” effects …nice….
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“I’m so ronery…” – Team America.
(copied from a link on the interwebz so I take no responsibility for accuracy)
I mean, how could Sandy resist such a cry for help for companionship / all other duties commensurate with the post?
[Reply]
SD Reply:
June 5th, 2010 at 4:24 pm
@Nikki ::
.. so ronery
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_cartman_ Reply:
June 8th, 2010 at 12:38 am
video with music for those who may not have seen TA
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xh_9QhRzJEs
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Nikki Reply:
June 8th, 2010 at 6:57 am
@_cartman_, thanks for putting that in here for our viewing pleasure, much appreciated!
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LMMMMMMMMMAOOOOOOOOOOO! Boys and girls you know what? I’ve noticed how certain comments about scammers being FAT, UGLY and SEXUALLY CONFUSED besides being ADDICTED TO FROZEN MAYONNAISE eating con artists, are being voted into the negative numbers in under almost 30 seconds of posting. Why is that???? ???? ???
I have came in on 9 different occassions, different day times, night times, and on at least one ocassion on every different day of the week since March and this has always been the case.
Which one of you D-bags is sitting at the computer 24/7 voting down negative comments about you? Why would you care that much? Is your life truly that shitty? Seriously, don’t you have a wife or mistress you can romance and that will occcassionally, AT LEAST FOR A FEW HOURS take you away from this site??
Sucks to be you, now vote that one down bitches
[Reply]
Nikki Reply:
June 5th, 2010 at 3:14 pm
@ROTFLAO!, a wife or mistress or even an inflatable lover would take far too much time away from the fridge / burger van.
Besides, when you can’t see your feet or in fact anything below your chins, how can you expect to find things that a wife / mistress / inflatable lover might be looking for?
[Reply]
SD Reply:
June 5th, 2010 at 4:44 pm
@ROTFLAO! ::
But also … many people just have soft/kind hearts … and think mean is mean. And others think the overt meanness makes the rest of my {otherwise important} message less powerful. It gives “them” an excuse to write me/us off as a bunch of nut-job haters … which we are not.
[Reply]
Liar Crusher Reply:
June 23rd, 2010 at 6:05 pm
@ROTFLAO!,
I think it is because being fat, ugly, sexually confused and addicted to eating frozen mayonnaisse (isn’t that pretty much what ice cream is anyway…or is it just that I can’t stand the stuff that it makes it seem the ingredient list is suspiciously similar?) doesn’t make you a bad, scummy or unscrupulous person…that preys on the innocent and robs people of their hard-earned money through flat-out lies.
Salty’s site…in my mind (and I don’t speak for the group because I know they are equipped to do that themselves here), is more about outing the charlatans who prey on the weak…NOT hating people because they are fat, or even queen-y or ugly…though we reserve the right to laugh our asses off at it and swear like fucking truck drivers…
Being those things doesn’t make Andy Jenkins a scumbag. Andy Jenkins makes himself a target and scumbag by preying on the innocent with deceptive practices shared by the great group of gagging gurus.
Being imperfect or different isn’t the problem or issue (if it were, a lot of us here would vaporize ;)
Who here feels perfect…wait, knowing y’all…DON’T answer that!!
I think that, largely (yep, out on a limb here), we don’t encourage tearing someone down because they’re human, but because they are not – predatory, malicious, deceitful…none of which fatness and mayonnaise-eating qualifies one as (but also doesn’t protect them from being!)
Like I say, “Forewarned gives you four arms”…or some shit like that ;) …and who couldn’t use more arms?!!!
If I’ve lost ya’, go troll about elsewhere…you likely don’t belong in this chatty bratroom… ;)
Liar Crusher
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Cursing at scammers is mean , but frying people in a tent is ..”positive vibration”. ROTFLAO!!!!
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Well little droid. You’ve been hiding. Looks like Frankie Kern has a new biz partner.Check out Jordan Belfort and look at the testimonial little Frankie gave the ultimate thief of all times. This guy ripped off millions and millions and millions of dollars. Makes Perry Belcher look like Mother Teresa. And Kern is lubing up to work with Belfort. He spoke at the List Control seminar.
[Reply]
SD Reply:
June 7th, 2010 at 1:22 pm
@JordanBelfort ::
Interesting. We were just talking about Boiler Room on another post.
Can anyone else confirm that this dipshit spoke at List Control?
[Reply]
Unicorn Army Reply:
June 7th, 2010 at 1:43 pm
@SD, Yes. He was the star of the show.
[Reply]
Birds of a feather no doubt Reply:
June 7th, 2010 at 4:15 pm
I used to think NOTHING of Frank Kern. Now I think even LESS than nothing.
Wow, that guy Belfort is a piece of work. Totally over the top criminal:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jordan_Belfort
“…white collar criminal who spent 22 months in jail for offences related to stock market manipulation and running a boiler room.[1]. He became notorious in the 1990s for founding the brokerage firm Stratton Oakmont which functioned as a boiler room, and also for his hard-partying lifestyle, which included a serious drug addiction”
http://www.cnbc.com/id/21114268
http://www.theaustralian.com.au/business/small-business/wolf-of-wall-street-back-on-the-prowl-jordan-belfort/story-e6frg9hf-1225776869682
http://www.nypost.com/p/pagesix/item_S5R74mbbQQ3D4dYFIBPdoJ;jsessionid=0E1094A24D03E681EB915150200B7B2C#ixzz0pBpZkFHJ
And the “man” himself:
http://www.jordanbelfortglobal.com
[Reply]
Tony Reply:
June 7th, 2010 at 6:32 pm
Here is some interesting “trivia” from one of the links above. That guy Belfort was totally out of control:
“…he flew his own helicopter while high, sank his 167-foot yacht (once owned by Coco Chanel) in the Mediterranean while high, drove with his 3-year-old daughter unbuckled beside him though a garage door while high. Belfort says at the height of his drug problem, he was taking 22 different medications: 20 quaaludes a day, balanced out by cocaine, the morphine, xanax, valium, etc. You name it, he abused it.”
I think this dude really needs a longer TIME OUT before he is ever trusted again. I’m thinking 50 years would be about right.
There is NO WAY Frank Kern didn’t know about this guy’s past. He probably thought it was, “like, totally cool.”
[Reply]
Duff Reply:
June 8th, 2010 at 1:53 pm
–QUOTE from http://www.jordanbelfortglobal.com–
“Jordan Belfort is the real deal. The Straight Line System is absolutely unbelievable. What I learned from him in terms of business operations how to maximize profits has completely changed how I do business. I couldn’t speak highly enough of Jordan or his materials. You’re in good hands with Jordan Belfort.”
- Frank Kern
Internet Marketer
–END QUOTE–
I’m beginning to think “the real deal” means “TOTAL SCAMMER–STAY THE F*%& AWAY!”
[Reply]
RJ Reply:
June 8th, 2010 at 4:01 pm
@Duff, All I can say is “Wow.” That endorsement totally nails Kern as a lowlife. Endorsing a felon of that magnitude is just inexcusable.
[Reply]
stoic Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 10:51 am
@Duff,
And to call it the ‘Straight Line System’, as opposed to what? Crooks Incorporated?—these guys are brazenly taking the jimmy riddle!
I have to stop visiting this site as the sheer brass balls exposed here with such wit has me laughing for hours.
[Reply]
Yup, Jordan Belfort was the headliner at List Control and he was drooling at the back table later, selling motivational DVD’s for god knows how much. “How I stole $200 million and took it up the ass in prison, and how you can too.”
He was bragging about how he is gonna be played in a movie of his life by Leo DiCaprio, directed by Martin Scorsese. IMDB lists it as “in development”.
[Reply]
Time out on my usual “time to tear salty super lib a new one” posts (really, those posts are for your own good, Salty).
Aren’t there pretty clear US laws to keep assholes like this Jordan fuck stain from profiting from their crimes? Specifically, isn’t it against the law for a criminal to write a book about his crimes, and then pocket the dough for the sale of those books? I’m pretty sure there are, and that they don’t just extend to violent crimes.
This scumbags whole “resurrected career” is based on his infamy of bilking millions of people out of money. That’s the only reason this gutter trash is given the time of day on the speaking circuit. It’s outrageous.
And, yeah, I echo the above sentiment–for Kern to swap spit with this dirt bag just because he’s got the gift of conning people is beyond the pale and telegraphs what that “surfer dude” asswipe is all about.
Kern can suck it long, and suck it hard. I’ve gone through all his products–including his last $2000 “masterpiece” List Control, and let me just say, I gotta throw in with Salty…Mass control is okay from a “how to use email to sell.” Seriously, it does have some valuable info on copywriting (how to push hot buttons) and marketing. Is it worth 2K? Get fucking real. Of course not. Packaged in a book published and sold at Amazon, it would sell for no more than $20.
List control, though, was nothing but a cash grab thrown out to his hooked addicts who line up for anything offered by these “gurus.” It was nothing but superficial shit found in dozens of books sold on Amazon. The videos? Worthless, containing no info that isn’t readily available on youtube or at ehow for free. Anyone who scurried to buy this garbage off of the usual launch hype, who didn’t have the brains to send it back for a refund with a huge “FUCK YOU FRANK,” should be ashamed of themself.
I gotta believe that the return rate for this shit was at least 60%. It just had to be.
And that “hey, I’m just a normal surfer dude slob how sobered up long enough to put this video together” schtick is sooooooooooooo fucking old and played. Yes, yes, Frank we get it–you’re Johnny Everyman. If you can do it, anyone can do it. You speak to the common man. Fuck that, and fuck you. If this guy is latching on to this crimminal Jordan whathisfuckingname, then he’s truly a worthless piece of shit.
[Reply]
Bob Reply:
June 7th, 2010 at 6:44 pm
@the voice of reason, That guy still has about $100+ million in court-ordered restitution to go. According to some of the info online, he has to pay 50% of all his future earnings to the previous victims.
I imagine Frank is hooking up with other people because his act has finally worn thin. He’s basically reselling the same “feelgood” stuff over and over, but with different catch phrases each time. He’s running out of fresh newbies to hawk that same tired crap to.
Kern’s really hit the bottom of the barrel with this “alliance,” that’s for sure.
[Reply]
Bud W. Eiser Reply:
June 7th, 2010 at 6:55 pm
I wonder if Frank Kern’s allegedly oh-so-successful dog ebooks include one that would work on him? It would be great to hear Frank just bark, instead of pretending to be a happy go lucky fake beach bum.
Hopefully his worshipper, Andy Jenkins, takes on the whole act. “Andy, dude, you’re gonna have to cut a huge hole in the middle of that surf board so you can belly surf, man. And don’t worry, the sharks won’t bother you. They’ll just think you are a whale.”
[Reply]
Frank Kern is an actor showman very little real to him.
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Duff Reply:
June 8th, 2010 at 1:55 pm
@mikefilsaimeinsider, You mean Kern’s not “the real deal”?
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look at all the pussies here hahaha “those guys are so bad, they too my hard worked money I should go tell mommy”
don’t you “honest” people have anything better to do lie..I don’t know…put some cash into your bank accounts?
always nice to see these “honest” people sites…makes my day everytime
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SD Reply:
June 21st, 2010 at 2:26 pm
@grey ::
… good points.
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Wonder if we kick Andy Jenkins in his fat gut if pork chops will fall out of his ass
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Posted this (t)rolling Pictography of blow-job post-coital shots of one of the popular Guru-lovers (literally!!)at Droid’s Kim and Sandy Episode 1, and thought I’d throw it in here, too…
Prepare to be nauseated!
http://www.craigbeckta.com/cool-photos/
Enjoy…and don’t say I didn’t warn ya’…
Liar Crusher
[Reply]
[...] shore. Theirs was a love conceived in warm mayonnaise … neckless :: feckless :: and throbbing [...]
[...] didn’t appreciate my appreciation of his bouffant boyfriend love the first time :: so I did it again as a special gift … in recognition of him sucking so much [...]
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