Home » Perry Belcher

Perry Belcher: Convicted Asshole

Author == SD 5 March 2009 10 Comments

im-still-fat

Introducing Perry Belcher >> Evil Idiot >> and new enemy of The Droid.

Perry {aka Evil Jowls} Belcher is a convicted felon.  He pled guilty-like-a-bitch to 12 counts of fraud and computer crime.  He was selling NOTHING PILLS as remedies for serious diseases!  He made-up false testimonials.  He made-up “Harvard” medical experts, and their statements.  Then he sold his BS at disgustingly high prices using pressure sales tactics and Multi-Level Marketing Cat Crap.  Once he had people’s credit card numbers, he started stealing from them directly.

He fucked over SICK PEOPLE!!  SICK PEOPLE!! The universe has already cursed them with suffering, but Perry Evil Jowls needed to pour on a little extra salt >> Quite Literally >> salt, oregano, cayenne pepper, sugar << NONE of which are effective against ::

  • bladder infections
  • headaches
  • depression
  • small penises
  • fatness
  • anxiety
  • cancer

This is the sort of scam that 1000′s of “marketers” are running all across the world.  It’s almost impossible to bring these small-time skank assholes to justice.  But my new enemy Perry Evil Jowls was so >> Idiotic >> Flagrant >> Block Fucking Stupid >> that he actually got caught!  Now he’s on parole for TEN years >> as a condition of that parole @perrybelcher is forbidden to participate in “misleading sales and marketing.”  Hmmm >>

Perry Evil Jowls started his Twitter account on September 18th 2008 >> He’s acquired 50,000 followers by SPAM following 50,000 users >> He adds thousands of new followers each day with this method >> He is finding new {not very tricky} ways to manipulate and steal from them.  He has no REAL skillz >> So it’s RIGHT BACK to scamming … probation be damned!

Perry Belcher {aka Evil Jowls},  just as you will always be a short, fat, stupid, evil douche bag >> I will always be watching you! And unlike your parole officer … I know your hood, I know your crew, and I know all of your BS sociopath moves.  I wonder if you are already in violation of your parole??  Let’s take a journey of discovery together and find out!!

>> bleep <<

-------------

More fabulously hilarious writing ::

  1. Perry Belcher: Hater of Asteroids Perry Evil Jowls Belcher speaking at the Austin Internet Marketing...
  2. Perry Belcher: On Bullshit According to Perry {Evil Jowls} Belcher, Perry {Evil Jowls}...
  3. Perry Belcher: Second Second Chance My fellow Americans: Major combat operations against Perry Belcher...
  4. Perry Belcher lies about MC Hammer? Perry {Evil Jowls} Belcher gave a speech at StomperNet...
  5. Perry Belcher Lies and Denies ::{MUG SHOT}::  __||__   ::{HAMMER SHOT}::   __||__  ::{FAKE...

:: read one now before you die of stupid.

10 Comments »

  • carolucky said:

    Hilarious!
    hey, I’m @carolucky. I don’t know much about Perry’s past, I think I read something about him being involved in some scams and that he kinda publicly apologised or something. I had no idea what the scams were about though. Either way, I’m not the hate type of person, so I will not judge people forever because of their past.
    Anyway, nice looking blog, although the whole hate thing is not my thing, but I respect you.
    take care.

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    # 8 March 2009 at 7:40 pm
  • sd (author) said:

    Tks Caro >>

    The Droid is only Pointing to Perry’s Past because of his Present!!

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    # 8 March 2009 at 10:59 pm
  • malcontentist said:

    hate is allowed on fridays. instead of #followfriday how about #fuckthemfriday seek. and. destroy.

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    # 20 March 2009 at 3:44 pm
  • sd (author) said:

    #fuckthemfriday would be far more useful!

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    # 20 March 2009 at 6:42 pm
  • craig said:

    lmao at #fuckthemfriday @igster101 on twitter. Perry did post an apology and explaination video about his past and came clean about it as far as I know.

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    # 2 April 2009 at 2:00 pm
  • sd (author) said:

    Craig :: Post your Twitter address as your URL when you comment, and then people will be able to click through to you :: I took the liberty of doing it for you ::

    Here’s what I think about Belcher’s BullShit Non-Explanation

    http://bit.ly/J2cLs

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    [Reply]

    # 2 April 2009 at 2:56 pm
  • » Snaps, Stats, and Suspensions said:

    [...] Here is my first tribute to you Evil Jowls!! http://is.gd/lTWj I hope you enjoy it like a bladder [...]

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    # 27 July 2009 at 5:15 am
  • » Auctioning Perry Belcher’s Million said:

    [...] {Evil Jowls} Belcher trolls around the internet claiming that he’s made $100 million dollars in the [...]

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    # 20 September 2009 at 2:10 am
  • _cartman_ said:

    I followed the link to that letsgetsocial.com link someone posted on the wailing wall (did you know that Social Media Manager is the most in demand job in the world…neither did I…and apparently someone forgot to send the memo to the US Census Bureau…damn government is hiding that fact…those bastards!).

    After finding nothing to read, I went to click away from it, and low and behold was presented with a chance to listen to module 1 (which is supposedly a free sample of what you get) oh joy, oh bliss, ohhhh fuck….

    It’s funny how (Dice and Some chick named Kate Buck Jr.) are trying to sell you on the “course” you “supposedly” already purchased (you’re getting to listen to module 1 for FREE…gawd bless the universal) which is actually nothing more then a sales pitch of Kates great success for her services…apparently the skills necessary to become a Social Media Manager fall between an ~IQ of 46 and a RPFM…oh joy, oh bliss, ohhh fuck…..

    Well lets be honest here (hahahaha..I made an irony), who am I to say that “setting up” a twitter, youtube, linked-in and facebook account for $300 isn’t totally worth it…although they claim that a 10year old RPFM could do it (okay maybe I threw in the RPFM part)…or that spending $2,500 a month for the celebrity maintenance package (don’t ask) isn’t worth it….not I…

    Then again, those prices are only there to show how much she makes….well…maybe not makes, butt charges…and if she can charge those prices and people are breaking down her door to hire her (she makes the magical $10K/month part time (aka: the magical online unicorn revenue)…working only hours per week), then she’s going to offer the same opportunity to you….cuz she cares….

    For ONLY $97 you can learn how to charge those prices too, and make the exact same theoretical $10K/month (ask yourself…what could you do with a theoretical $10K/month in extra income….the theoretical benefits are endless)…ohhh joy…ohhh bliss….ohhh fuck….

    PS – No RPFM’s realized they were insulted in the creation of any of my posts. The SPCIM (Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Internet Marketers) monitors the creation of all my posts. Sorry IM’ers butt you know what they say….Greatness “attacks” Mediocrity….

    _cartman_ out….

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    [Reply]

    # 27 June 2010 at 11:47 pm
  • » Perry Blecher Reunion Show said:

    [...] But that was a skill of little virtue in his battle with the fake robot :: which began with this March 2009 post. By September 2009 :: Evil Jowls had begun his capitulation in the comments of a post about this [...]

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    # 22 November 2011 at 2:09 am

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