Wordles and Sounds
Another ShitStorm come and gone … turds blowing all over … websites getting smeared with Kajabi. Unsightly!
The StomperNet ShitStorm … way back when … finished at 27,000 words.
The Syndicate ShitStorm … way back two weeks ago … finished at 57,000 words.
What a wordy fake hate mob y’all are.
Speaking of wordy :: I made a Wordle of those 57,000 words :: behold the top 150 repeated words. Consider it my gift to you people :: which I have only given because it cost me nothing. You’re welcome.
Many doubting doubters wanted to hear the full Jenkins/Walker Shitstorm tapes … not content with my entertaining versions of a most unentertaining conversation. Alright then … let the mouth breathing evil begin …
Andy Jenkins :: Jeff Walker :: Plotting & Panting 1
Intermission {get yourself a barf bag from the lobby}
Andy Jenkins :: Jeff Walker :: Plotting & Panting 2
Now that you’re done listening to Andy Jenkins boast disgustingly about going to NYU … and using NYU’s tuition rates to “anchor” the ridiculous price of his shit frauduct … go to NYU’s alumni listings and find him. Good luck!
>> bleep bloop
More fabulously hilarious writing ::
- Kim and Sandy :: Episode 3 Nothing lasts forever. {that’s what she said.} Love is...
- The Video Boss 2 – Andy Jenkins Retrospective Syndicates have a hard time concocting new and original evil plans...
- Syndicate Shit Storm —— UPDATE :: Video taken down by badguys …...
- Jeff Walker’s Poison Launch Formula Okay :: there’s a business lesson in here …...
- BrAndy Full On Fake Robot on trial duty. Syndicate so happy. Something...
:: read one now before you die of stupid.
I’m only 5 minutes into listening but just have to say that Andy Jenkins panting and heavy breathing is VERY DISTURBING. I think he should go and see a doctor or something.
I think that scammers like Andy Jenkins were probably bullied quite bad as kids therefore they’ve lost faith in humanity so don’t give a shit if they scam people or take advantage to them.
A story..
Andy Jenkins was probably like the school pig. Fat and a heavy breather and not one of those likeable fat people with the nice personalities. He was a fat, heavy breathing, dark and evil little child. Sent to us from the depths of hell to wreak havoc and scam as much money from people as humanly possible, his heavy breathing is a constant reminder as to why he was put on this earth… To scam..
Along with his fellow hellish brethren known as “the syndicate” they sit in their pits plotting ways to extract as much money from their vulnerable “sheeple” as possible.
Dipping their pens in blood and putting it to paper outlining their next frauduct launch Frank Kern, Andy Jenkins, Jeff Walker, Ryan Deiss and the rest of the syndicate are all huddled around simply plotting when out of nowhere there was a BANG and the door to the creepy dark and dank dungeon blasted open filling it with light!
As the syndicate reeled back, their eyes in agony from the light. The Gnome shrieked. “There’s something in the fucking doorway”.
And there stood something in the doorway. The atmosphere was tense. So tense that for several minutes nobody moved. All that could be heard was the heavy panting of Andy Jenkins.
And then as the syndicates eyes finally adjusted to the light. They saw that in the doorway, stood at around 3 and a half feet tall was the SALTY DROID.
The Salty Droid set to work eliminating the Syndicate Scum and with two simple words the floor of the dungeon split open revealing the fiery pits of hell from whence the Syndicate came. The syndicate fell down into hell shrieking as they were to suffer an eternity of pain because Scammers are hated even in Hell. It’s a common fact that Hitler likes to use Gnomes as butt plugs, especially scamming little Gnomes.
But I bet you’re now wondering what words the Salty Droid used to eliminate the Syndicate. Listen closely fine reader because I’m going to tell you…
bleep bloop
WINNER!! ::
+26
[Reply]
Wannabe Producer Reply:
October 22nd, 2010 at 7:49 am
@Jeff Sucks Balls,
That sounds like the plotline of a FANTASTIC film. Maybe Brad Fallon and Andy Jenkins will produce it. I hear they are hot-shot Hollywood types now.
[Reply]
Mathias Reply:
October 22nd, 2010 at 10:56 am
@Wannabe Producer,
“Mommy?”
“yes sweety?”
“Theres an ugly fat monser under my bed…”
“Now sweety, i’ve already told you, Andy Jenkins isn’t real, he’s just part of your imagin….
(heavy breathing coming from under the bed)
“Arrrhgg!!!!!”
WINNER!! ::
+14
[Reply]
SD Reply:
October 22nd, 2010 at 12:43 pm
@Jeff Sucks Balls ::
Sweet! Fan fiction … now I’m even more like a Japanese Anime girl.
[Reply]
Listen to 29:29 to 29:35 of the first MP3 – sounds a bit like a porno!
[Reply]
Lol looking at the Wordle I see “Salty Know Mike Get People Money”!
Feeling a bit queasy after the audios, more so because of Walker than Jenkins I must admit.
[Reply]
40% ums
30% ars
30% heavy breathing
=100% bullshit
Honestly, I could smell the horse breath from here.
Excusing the content of the call, listening to these guys would you take advice from these two?
It sounds like the outtakes from beavis and butthead!
WINNER!! ::
+14
[Reply]
“This is one of those weird launches where … you know … I’ve got everything going for me except the product”
- Andy Jenkins
LOL! I think you flatter yourself Elf-Ass.
And for all those Kajabi Knobbies out there: If Jenkins confessed that all he wanted from the Video Boss hustle was was a solid list, imagine the level of support you can expect putting your “business” on Kajabi.
Save yourself some time and money (i.e. setup fees and continuity) and just email your lists to Jenkins and Walker. They’ll get them anyway when you cancel.
Don’t think I can listen to the second mp3 today though. 47 minutes of Darth Vader sucking up to Howdy Doody is all I can stand for now.
WINNER!! ::
+11
[Reply]
Please keep in mind :: as you experience the horror :: that I had to listen to the whole fucking thing at least 10 times to make all those cuts.
Meanwhile :: Andy Jenkins is winning all the local “emmys” {fake slow clapping}.
[Reply]
Hal (the original Hal) Reply:
October 22nd, 2010 at 7:44 pm
@SD,
You’re definitely a machine.
No sane person could listen to that 10 times and not puncture their own eardrums to make it stop.
WINNER!! ::
+10
[Reply]
Cromulent Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 7:18 am
@SD, You couldn’t have Fake Secretary Debbie do some of that?
[Reply]
jenkins say in tape two that he made 50 videos and only 5 of them is he in them reason is he knows he is creepy and comes across as pond scum so knows he is best not to show himself in video walker spends a lot of time in the first tape reassurimg him that he comes across geniune because Walker knows the jenkins is insecure about his appearance in videos.
Video boss can’t be in video because video is pond scum and no boss but an elf floating with the gnome and Jeff cult creeper Walker.
WINNER!! ::
+8
[Reply]
Jack Reply:
October 22nd, 2010 at 2:59 pm
@mikefilsaimeinsider, I like the way how you did that last part and made the final piece of your comment a Haiku:
no boss but an elf
floating with the gnome and Jeff
cult creeper Walker
WINNER!! ::
+14
[Reply]
Thanks for that recording, Salty. I turned up the speakers really loud, and Andy’s deep breathing helped shake loose the dust on my top kitchen shelves that I hadn’t been able to reach myself. Next week I’ll use that recording of Andy to clean the ceiling in my sewing room.
WINNER!! ::
+22
[Reply]
I know this is a little off topic, but when did this prick transform into “Ol’ Cous’ Andy”. Fuck me! He can kiss my ass.
[Reply]
Bullshit Detector Reply:
October 22nd, 2010 at 4:23 pm
@RocketRodney, “Cuzz’n Andy” is pseudo-psych that Andy hopes will translate to “come on, trust me.” Not sure who’s buying it though.
[Reply]
Nobody Important Reply:
October 22nd, 2010 at 7:16 pm
He ripped off Trey Smith. Kern calls him “Old Cuzin Trey”
Couldn’t even think of his own title, what a freakin’ Jeenus.
WINNER!! ::
+7
[Reply]
Thanks Salty for these recordings, they were icky to listen to, had to take breaks and shower in between listening, yech! I am beginning to think that either Sandy Jenkins is having heart problems or is just a pervert. Maybe both! “ugly and fat, got bad teeth” – Jeff Walker
This is a neat graphic you’ve made and I notice a Halloween pumpkin. Will you be releasing a ghoulish revelation about a dbag this year’s Halloween? (Bob Proctor?? *wishful thinking* LOL)
WINNER!! ::
+7
[Reply]
H/t to @Jeff Sucks Balls for literary exposition, but the best framework for understanding Andy Jenkins (and the likes of Andy Jenkins) is to realize Andy is a hustler.
The venue is immaterial. If Andy wasn’t a plague upon our house of Internet marketing, he’d be involved in some other industry and he’d be be a hustler there. Why? Because that’s what hustlers do. They hustle. They have a criminal mentality and it’s simply the only way that their paranoid, low self-esteem lizard brains know how to operate.
WINNER!! ::
+10
[Reply]
Sociopath Observer Reply:
October 22nd, 2010 at 5:19 pm
@andyhair, You could also be describing convicted felon Perry Belcher (Ryan Deiss’ puppetmaster). Now THAT guy is 100% hustler, through and through. Wonder if Andy Jenkins looks up to him.
WINNER!! ::
+7
[Reply]
we got a bleeder…He was masturbating….he was masturbating….this never happened to woogie
[Reply]
New Frauduct: Meditating with Andy Jenkins.
1 hour of video of Andy sitting in various yoga poses in complete silence.
Here’s a sneak peak at the subtitles:
“HMMPPHHH HUUFFFFFF AAAAAA HMMMPPPHHH UHHHH HMMPPHHH HOFFFF HMMMMMPPH HUFFFF!”
WINNER!! ::
+11
[Reply]
HuffNPuff Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 10:51 am
@Meditating with Andy Jenkins, Pretty sure Kilstein has the copyright on that
[Reply]
I’m embarrassed to admit this but I purchased Sandy’s Video Boss course.
There is a whole module in the course about how to use audio post production techniques to filter out heavy breathing. I always wondered why…
WINNER!! ::
+8
[Reply]
Chip Reply:
October 22nd, 2010 at 8:12 pm
@RunBrunsonRun, Just think, you could have bought that for $495 or less if it hadn’t been for Jeff Walker encouraging Andy to really “stick it to ‘em.”
[Reply]
One small part of an email I received from Jeff Walker some months ago promoting one of his partners. Check out the term “Business in a box”
And now Mike’s put together a full-out set of
tools AND training that will literally put you in
business.
Now you know that I don’t go around promoting
“business-in-a-box” stuff… because I just don’t
usually believe in it.
But this is one time where you really do get the
tools and the training to put yourself into
business in one quick step. It really IS a
“business-in-a-box”… check it out:
WINNER!! ::
+8
[Reply]
Bullshit Detector Reply:
October 22nd, 2010 at 9:58 pm
@Sheeple 1, Just “wow.” What an undeniable BULLSHIT ARTIST Jeff Walker is. Incredible.
[Reply]
I take it all back.
It is good to be deaf at times. :)
Thankfully I won’t be subjected to having my eardrums battered by bullshit.
[Reply]
_cartman_ Reply:
October 23rd, 2010 at 8:36 am
@rob sellen,
Try again, sometimes hearing goes in and out….it should be back now…
[Reply]
rob sellen Reply:
October 23rd, 2010 at 8:54 am
@_cartman_, Not with my ears mate, I rely on lipreading… not doable here, in any case prefer lipreading ladies. ;o)
though that can hurt my neck holding head at 90 degrees at times. ;)
thanks though. ;)
[Reply]
I keep getting ‘bandwidth exceeded by user unable to listen’ …
[Reply]
_cartman_ Reply:
October 23rd, 2010 at 9:12 am
@Danny,
hmmm…try refreshing (and/or closing and reopening the browser)….the bandwidth issue was corrected at 8:36 EDT, that message may be cached.
[Reply]
Danny Reply:
October 23rd, 2010 at 9:22 am
@_cartman_,
thanks … just opened a new browser and it’s fine
[Reply]
Schools in at Frank Kern University…
http://frankkernsuccess.com/
Looks like he’s trying to become the next Anthony Robbins. Deep shit in that video above. Real deep.
Salty – although listening to Andy Jenkins’ heavy breathing is very relaxing, I for one would like to see more exposure on the whole “Money Masters,” Syndicate, Kern/Koenigs, Anthony Robbins frauduct.
Robbins’ sophisticated “money extortionist masters” methods are way more telling than Jenkins extreme doucheness.
I may be going out on a limb here… but I think you’ve got more to share on it. Not that you haven’t done enough already. (-:
Thanks again for the “hypnotic” audio files above. They really do help me sleep better at night.
[Reply]
gringo Reply:
October 24th, 2010 at 7:40 pm
@Irwin,
not that deep, I can´t swim
[Reply]
Burn in hell Kern Reply:
October 24th, 2010 at 9:10 pm
@Irwin,
God damn that was awful.
He’s turned the walls in his house into all whiteboards.
When he’s in the kitchen, he’s reverse engineering how he pours a drink on the whiteboard.
When he’s in his bedroom, he’s on the whiteboard reverse engineering how he changes into his PJ’s.
When he’s in bathroom, he’s reverse engineering the marker up his ass.
Lame lame lame.
[Reply]
Irwin Reply:
October 24th, 2010 at 9:32 pm
@Burn in hell Kern,
LOL. Sounds like you learnt more than I did!
[Reply]
Jack Reply:
October 24th, 2010 at 10:50 pm
@Irwin, mr. Kern says in that video that he made up the idea that –
what we put into our head makes us think certain things -
- and then when we think those things we make decisions becuase of the things were thinking -
- and then we take some actions based on what we decided to do -
- and then we make a bunch of sales I think.
But maybe he just wants to make people stop going to the Salty Droid site and maybe it’s the whole goal of the video, because –
if they put the SD stuff in their head
- then they will think “Myabe I shouldn’t buy the Frank Kern product
- and if they think “Maybe I shouldn’t buy the Frank Kern product
- then maybe they would make a decision like NOT buying the Frank Kern product –
- and then their action would be to do something other than to buy the Frank Kern product -
- and then it would be less $Sales for mr. Kern –
so probably that’s why mr. Kern really made the video I think.
Also he talkeds about his 8 year old daughter which is making me now think that if you want to make money online maybe somehow you have to involve some children somehow either in pictures or talking about them in a story, maybe.
WINNER!! ::
+8
[Reply]
Les Talk Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 12:03 am
@Jack, in Kern’s alternative universe:
Children = “Props”
[Reply]
Anonymous Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 10:24 am
@Irwin, thanks that was an eye opener.
[Reply]
Jenkins sounds like is breathlessly masturbating to Joan River’s jewelry network programming.
WINNER!! ::
+11
[Reply]
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
LOSER!! ::
-7
[Reply]
Chip Reply:
October 24th, 2010 at 9:04 pm
@Anon, You might want to listen to the audios then.
WINNER!! ::
+7
[Reply]
Vic Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 1:02 am
@SD,
Salty, are you sure Sandy & Jeffrey were in two different locations at the time of these recordings?
Sounds like one of them was on the receiving end of a strap-on session. ;o)
- Vic
[Reply]
Anonymous Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 7:58 am
@Vic, don’t be stupid! Sandy Jenkins is already taken by you know who! http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/683063 Don’t they make a cute couple?
[Reply]
Joe Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 8:47 am
@, Yes, what a couple. Not quite as cute as a pair of vermin-afflicted, rabid cave bats dipped in shit, but at least that’s something they can aspire to.
[Reply]
andyhair Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 8:59 am
@Anon, re: “but Jenkins had a real web business (and so did Fallon for that matter) that they publicly disclosed.”
Really? Last I checked Fallon’s wife was the one who had a real business, and not coincidentally, is still the one with a real business. I’m not sure where you’re getting your facts.
[Reply]
Attila Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 9:27 am
@andyhair, Of course Andy likes to talk about his days of selling swords on ebay. That’s something that has a real high barrier to entry, lol. You just need swords and lunatics, and you’re in business.
SD Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 11:42 am
@Anon ::
I didn’t read your comment … but your opinions about the Higgs boson are theoretically unsustainable.
[Reply]
Bandwidth exceeded! Re-up that shit! I want to hear it.
[Reply]
As a law school grad, you know that cruel and unusual punishment is banned by the Constitution. Shame on you, Droid… (and the only crime committed was buying stuff from these guys!)
Makes me glad that I dumped Internet Marketing for something less risky. You know, like selling naked options…
[Reply]
Someone needs to upload it to MultiUpload.com and post a link here ASAP! : )
[Reply]
South park special episode: “Cartman kicks Andy jenkins fat ass”
I’d pay mucho to see that happen.
[Reply]
I’ve reupped it here:
http://www.multiupload.com/UQMWD2US3X
http://www.multiupload.com/WA0XFBW3K6
[Reply]
SD Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 11:44 am
@Spank My Monkey ::
thanks.
[Reply]
Files back up … without a bandwidth cap this time … pigs.
Thanks @_cartman_
[Reply]
Salty something’s going on with the website…I couldn’t log yestarday.:S
[Reply]
SD Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 1:10 pm
@Affisio ::
Yeah it’s brokens … we are working on it.
[Reply]
Hal Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 6:45 pm
@SD, You should get a job and then you could afford some decent hosting :)
[Reply]
Anonymouse Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 10:36 pm
@Hal, don’t be falling into the trap of thinking because someone doesn’t have an employer they don’t have a job:)
[Reply]
Hal Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 11:27 pm
@Anonymouse, Who said anything about an employer? Not me. Read it again.
[Reply]
Hi Salty!
How about a donation button to help with . . . . . whatever?
BTW, “3 legs” ….get it? ….
From,
the knee slapper
[Reply]
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
LOSER!! ::
-5
[Reply]
Moron Detection Subsystem Reply:
October 25th, 2010 at 11:42 pm
@Anon, Who has time to visit this blog? You do. Who has time to post a stupid comment? You do. Just sayin’…
[Reply]
I tried Kajabi out and once inside it kinda seemed lame. Then I looked at all the free stuff via the links on SD and I soon discovered that Kajabi is not worth the price.
I did apply for a refund, but my user name and password no longer work. If they charge me there will be hell to pay.
K
[Reply]
while I can’t find any record of Andrew or “Andy” Jenkins at NYU, it must be a mistake… Andy has to have a B.S.
He lives and breathes B.S. he been spewing B.S. for years.
as a matter of fact, when I think of B.S., I think of Andy…
ooh I know.. I’ll check under the name “Sandy” or “Frodo”
[Reply]
SD Reply:
November 30th, 2010 at 1:23 am
@Chris ::
For the record :: a little birdie told me that he’s James Andrew Jenkins … Class of ’93 … which is in the database.
Big congrats to NYU on their impressive alumni.
[Reply]
I would love to know if that worm Walker was being paid for this. He just sits back and lets that heavy breathing mess babble on, and then tries to come up with some ground breaking angle. Hilarious.
What a couple of jerk offs. Jenkins is a paranoid head case that seems to lack any self confidence whatsoever. His new Frankie hair kills me.
When are these characters going to prison?
[Reply]
SD Reply:
November 30th, 2010 at 1:15 am
@Donk ::
I’d love to know if he was being paid too … I’ll bet yes. You’ll find them all hanging around on various things as high cost dead weight. “Providing value” I guess.
[Reply]
WTF – This shit was GREAT STUFF. Glad I never bought there shit but got it for FREE.
[Reply]
It’s funny how whenever the Salty Droid comes up in their conversation, a nervous silence falls on them. It’s like they are simultaneously coming to the realization …
“Oh God … we’re fucked!!”
But they continue with their sinister bullshit.
Having listened to the entire recording I feel like I’m covered in a film of slimy stinking shit.
BTW: SD you are one funny dude.
[Reply]
SD Reply:
February 15th, 2011 at 4:19 am
@Vern ::
At least they were finally right about something!
[Reply]
After having listened to these GURUS (aka-”gobshites”) I feel I need a good strong green tea enema to cleanse me, body and soul.
Salty, your efforts at bringing clarity to the muddled puddle of piss and putrification that postures as a SINdicate, are to be commended.
That being said… I must admit that I have learned A LOT from these guys: mostly what NOT to do in marketing…
And I picked up a few heavy breathing and panting tricks sure to turn my man on.. (hubba hubba Andy Jerkins- you manly man you!)
The Arte of Epic Douchebaggery
TY Salty!
WTF is “contenty”? Are they making up words now? “manipulate the answers to create content?” My my isn’t Andy a Jackoff of All Trades?
[Reply]
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