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Salty Droid 2012

Author == 2 January 2013 45 Comments

Fake robot :: year four … totally done already!

My goal for 2012 was to rid the world of evil … so that’s a fail.

But I did achieve some lesser objectives …

– I wrote a song about a manatee and some twinkies

– I made a hit movie for a maker of hit movies

– I hated a book

– I incited an uprising

– I pissed off some more lawyers

– I slapped a state in the face

 … shit like that.

Three of the most popular posts this year …

Elevation Prohpets

Frank Kern in Scamworld

10 Internet Marketers Doing it Right

That last one is a particular masterpiece :: it’s prolly why I was invited to speak at BlogWorld … not everyone can write nothing so successfully.

I’m temped to post in Scamworld: The Movie one last time :: because it was too obviously this year’s main thing … but I’m not going to.

… oops.

It’s been a productive year in this fight against people who need to be fought.

Thanks to everyone … expecially me.

I’ll bet you one billion dollars that next year is even better.

>> bleep bloop

45 Comments »

  • Alison said:

    Happy New Year, Droid.

    WINNER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down +17

    [Reply]

    SD Reply:

    @Alison ::

    Happy New Year :: Alison.

    Or maybe “happy” is a bit much to ask for considering your current conundrums.

    One more year :: one day at a time … you can do it.

    [Reply]

    Alison Reply:

    @SD, It’s one day at a time at Casa Navarro; but I tell you what, that’s the best way to learn to appreciate every sunrise. :) We’ll get through it, just a bumpy ride for the foreseeable future. I still think you’re a pretty amazing robot, exposing people for what they are and shining a profanity-laden light on the evil they do.

    I had someone try to tell me I should do Mary Kay from home just the other day. I had the opportunity to explain to them what a pyramid scheme was and pointed out your Herbalife post. Eyes are being opened one person at a time.

    And re: Mountain Goats – I had a pretty awesome conversation with someone about them yesterday. They showed me his NYE twitter feed, he had some insightful things to say about survivors. :)

    WINNER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down +14

    [Reply]

    mirele Reply:

    @Alison,

    If people don’t believe you about Mary Kay, Tracy Coenen has put together a *great* website debunking Mary Kay. It’s http://www.pinktruth.com.

    Eyes are being opened all over the place. My personal thanks for being a part of that.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

    [Reply]

    G. Reply:

    @ Hi Alison,
    I’m not sure if this has been asked before and furthermore I am not sure of the protocol for asking and I hope it’s ok to ask, but I was wondering if it was possible for us to maybe send a Xmas donation your way. Maybe through paypal or something.
    I apologise if the thought is in any way offensive or presumptuous, but I think a lot of people who read this blog would be happy to make a small contribution to say a surprise gift for your kids. No special reason, just that I am sure I am not alone in wishing we can do something a bit more concrete than just write comments here.
    If so please let me know I’ll be happy to set up a page or something so people can donate to you directly.
    Happy 2013

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

    [Reply]

  • Omri Shabat said:

    May 2013 would be filled with arrests and FTC!

    WINNER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down +15

    [Reply]

    mirele Reply:

    @Omri Shabat,

    And not just May, but January, February, March and all the rest of those months.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

    [Reply]

  • Wyrd said:

    I second @Alison and @Omri Shabat on the Happy New Year and the hopes for 2013.
    ————–
    For some reason, my youtube player now does a play-all by default so now every video under that username is playing back-to-back. It acts as its own sort of auto-retrospective.
    ————–
    Re 10 Internet Marketers Doing it Right: agreed, that post’s popularity is especially cool as the content of the article was, basically, empty. Although I still prefer intentionally misinterpret and to pretend that {Awkward Crickets} in fact is an Internet Marketer doing it right–and either he’s a turtle or else a turtle is his mascot.

    I never have quite figured out your thing with turtles, @SD. Me, I just go with exploding cows. (But not real cows though–that’d be unnecessarily cruel. Real cows, I just eat from McDonalds like normal people.)

    Moo moo moo


    Furry cows moo and decompress.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

    [Reply]

  • Jack said:

    Modest Mouse – 3 time SD winner!

    WINNER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down +9

    [Reply]

  • Yakaru said:

    Happy New Year to all….

    And some words from the prophet, from the days before Internet Marketing: Neil Young’s haunting ballad, Piece of Crap

    “…Saw it on the tube, bought it on the phone, now you’re home along with a piece of crap
    ….Went back to the store they gave me four more, the guy told me at the door, it’s a piece of crap.”

    WINNER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down +7

    [Reply]

  • joe C said:

    SD,

    Too bad this upcoming Ryan Deiss event is not closer to your home. It is only $1K on the honor system. You would have a blast at it. :0

    http://trafficandconversionsummit.com/join.php?utm_source=Affiliate%20Program&utm_medium=Email%20Broadcast%20-%20Dedicated&utm_term=&utm_content=&utm_campaign=DMAffiliatesTandC%2050%20off&Contact0LeadSourceId=2844&email=

    Best

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

    [Reply]

  • colleens brother in law said:

    JUST WANT TO SAY HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE…..LETS HOPE 2013 IS BETTER THAN 2012…..PRAYING FOR CLOSURE FOR MY BROKEN FAMILY….john

    WINNER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down +16

    [Reply]

  • Conor said:

    It’s good to be a part of it.

    Thank you for lighting the lamp and leading the way.

    Bring it on.

    Conor

    WINNER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down +7

    [Reply]

  • MX5 said:

    To Joe C

    I hope you realise mate that you are helping to create the brand of all these gurus and shit you keep buying from them. Think about yourself and the other thousands who for example got a hyped up sales letter, thinking your getting value when i can bet the information you receive can be found for free on the net.

    1K – not bad, sell that to 1000 pople you have a million – but what about those one thousand people???

    They dont gve a dam about u joe or any of their customers, save your money and build your own brand.

    Ryan Deiss is in the same mastermind as frank kern, andy jenkins, filsaime etc……… so go figure

    but good luck to you if you want to waste thousands making other people rich.

    To everyone else – happy new year

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

    [Reply]

    Joe C Reply:

    @MX5,

    Actually my post above is not well written as I was being facetious. I do not care for windbag Ryan Deiss nor his spamming.

    Best regards,
    Joe

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

    [Reply]

  • Cosmic Connie said:

    And a belated Happy New Year to you too, little robot. May this be the year that the Minions’ Uprising really starts making some noise!

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

    [Reply]

  • Jim said:

    It’s funny watching Ryan and Perry try to break into Silicone Valley to appear legit by holding their Traffic and Conversion event in San Francisco this month.

    They are bringing in William Shatner and Guy Kawasaki to be keynote speakers.

    Wonder if they or their PR teams would be happy to know their “celebrity” is being associated with and supporting a convicted felon in order to rob more unsuspecting newbies blind.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

    [Reply]

  • DCBC said:

    Belated Happy New Year SD. Been playing catch up here. You are a hero. Not sure whether to feel ashamed or proud that I hadn’t paid much attention to scamworld before, aside from CopyBlogger whom I kind of feel gave me a lot of value (I seem to remember more useful Copywriting and less blogging about blogging / sales funnels once upon a time) and whom I’m sorry turned out to be among em. Though he did seem a wad on Twitter.

    You might have convinced me that the only way to be an “Internet Marketer” is to go in-house with a co that can afford it. Otherwise there’s pretty well nothing you can put on your business cards anymore that doesn’t sound sleazy thanks to these guys.

    Looking forward to being considered for 2013′s top 10. And finding some way to contribute to the kind of thing that’s going on here. And showing this blog and others like it to many people.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

    [Reply]

    Lanna Reply:

    @DCBC,

    LOL, this is a good one, dude!

    fpmc_wf-300x167

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

    [Reply]

  • John Stewart said:

    Ed Dale has gone bankrupt
    “On January 31, 2013, Mr. Edward Wells Dale, the Board Chairman, President and Chief Executive Officer of 30DC, Inc. (“the Company”) was adjudicated in personal bankruptcy in Australia resulting from claims of personal creditors, which is the equivalent of involuntary bankruptcy in the United States.”
    http://biz.yahoo.com/e/130201/tdch8-k.html

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

    [Reply]

    Anonymous Reply:

    @John Stewart, but he can still show you how to get rich!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

    [Reply]

  • Mark Twain said:

    What a crock of shit this site is. You people really sit around and cry because your all failures. It’s easier to attack successful people rather than to become successful yourselves.

    Freedom of speech does not give you legal right to use other peoples content or intellectual property at your free will nor does it give you the legal right to smear/smudge a company.

    Who is worse? A guy that creates a product and then of course tries to sell it or a guy that sits behind a bunch of crying pussies mad because he couldn’t succeed himself?

    Everything in our lives that we own was at one time marketed and sold. It was sold because it targeted an audience that was interested.

    I bought a water hose the other day because walmart had a sign up with a hot looking soccer mom watering her flowers. I was instantly horny as hell and so i bought the hose. So fuck walmart?

    Thumb up Thumb down -3

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Mark Twain, I think maybe about what you’re trying to tell us is something I found out about from my friend Josh Billings:

    “Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain’t lawful tender for a loaf of bread.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

    [Reply]

    Yakaru Reply:

    @Mark Twain,

    Oh for heaven’s sake, you still haven’t got it have you. “You are” contracts into “you’re”, not “your”. Pay attention: I hope you’re (contraction) having fun fucking your (possessive) hose.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

    [Reply]

    Unicorn Army Reply:

    @Mark Twain, youre right, there’s nothing worse than a smudge campaign.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

    [Reply]

    Richie Reply:

    @Mark Twain,
    I bet the water hose you bought wasn’t being promoted by competing water hose companies?

    Might be because they’re in competition with each other and not forming illegal syndicates together.

    This might seem weird to you, but Apple doesn’t send out emails telling you to buy androids, Google doesn’t send out emails telling you to search on Bing, and Pepsi doesn’t send out emails telling people to buy coke.

    Why is that? Maybe it’s because that’s how business works in a competitive market.

    That’s not how it works with your buddy’s in internet marketing though, is it?

    Eben sends an email out for Jeff, Jeff sends and email out for Andy, Andy sends one out for Ryan and the circle continues.

    You are right. Every product I buy is marketed and sold to me, but not one was sold to me on the behalf of a competitor.

    Crazy weird how that works, isn’t it?

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Mark Twain, I bought a water hose the other day and I don’t know about why the cashier asked me about giving them my phone number, but I think it was to make sure I could make my best use of the water hose and luckily for me I got calls from many people spoofing cell-numbers telling me about how they could help me make the best use of my water hose for by getting me 1-on-1 coaching and wanted to know if I wanted to be in some sort of special test program for using water hoses, because if I was luck to get selected, then maybe they can use me for a testimonial about how good the water came out of the water hose, but mainly because they helped me for a nominal ($20,000 – $60,000) sum to make sure I got water from the hose the best way it’s able to come out from that hose.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

    [Reply]

    Wyrd Reply:

    @Jack,

    $20,000 – $60,000 is a terrible rip off. But at least you get a water hose out of it.

    Is that how that one goes? “Yes, these courses sure are expensive. But I got such great information out of it!” I got such great water out of my hose! My water is of higher quality than my neighbor Mr. Jones because Jeff taught me the thumb trick. etc.

    ============

    This has been said at least once, but it bears repeating:

    @Mark Twain: You are no Mark Twain. Not by a long way.


    Furry cows moo and decompress.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

    [Reply]

  • Otonomo said:

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    LOSER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down -5

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Otonomo, “And did you REALLY quote $20,000 to $60,000 spent on IM products? Really? Is this the amount an individual spends on IM products over the span of what.. 5-10 years?”

    Somebody with the Otonomo name needs to go get a good Tax Club.

    Also, don’t use the R-word without so much thinking, because MY retardation is just about anything but simple!

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Otonomo,

    “The reality is when you buy the hose, you are told that you need a $8000 generator for your home since hurricanes are starting to hit the Eastern Seaboard more than ever. The Generator is faulty and when the Hurricane comes, your $8000 Generator doesn’t even work. Fix it!”

    Is it about this “reality” you tell us about:

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

    [Reply]

    Luther Reply:

    @Otonomo: “It is amazingly asinine to overlook corporate tyranny and focus on annihilating something so important.”

    I guess maybe “corporate tyranny” is code for maybe “Iphones” and “something so important” is code for “get rich quick in your underwear.” But I’m not falling for it especially since I found out you can also use an Iphone in your underwear!

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

    [Reply]

    richie Reply:

    @Otonomo,
    Of course I’m retarded Otonomo. What else could someone who holds an opposing view to you be, right?

    But just in case I’m not retarded here’s some examples of where the companies I mentioned above are not all bff’s like you suggest they are.

    Let’s start with Microsoft and Google shall we?

    In case you haven’t watched a television in the last twelve months Microsoft are currently producing an ad campaign called Scroogled. Guess what? It doesn’t involve personalized messages by the owners of Microsoft recommending that their customers search on Google.

    Shockingly Microsoft are not very flattering of Google at all. Maybe it’s my retardation, but I think Microsoft is suggesting that Google is screwing their users right in their ad campaign title. “Scroogled”

    I bet Google must be all like, “WTF Microsoft I thought we were Bff’s”

    Just because I know I’m super stupid and not on your obviously superior level, you can go to http://www.scroogled.com/. Maybe the super smart people at Microsoft can match your mighty intellect and do a better job at explaining what a competition based market is all about.

    And guess what dickhead, Google has to abide by anti-trust type laws. That’s why Bing can advertise on adsense.

    I know your awesome brain probably already knows what anti-trust laws are, but just in case you don’t, here’s a basic Wikipedia description: “United States antitrust law is a collection of federal and state government laws, which regulates the conduct and organization of business corporations, generally to promote fair competition for the benefit of consumers.”

    Weird shit, right?

    Let’s move on to my second example shall we? I think it was Android and Iphone.

    Have you seen the recent Galaxy S4 ads. Wait I forgot you haven’t turned on a t.v in a year.

    Well Android powers the S4 and they’re just having a good ol’ time poking fun at the iphone…

    But again don’t take my word for it. Here’s a link to an article that will do a far better job of explaining what’s going on than my retarded brain ever could, http://www.pocket-lint.com/news/120829-samsung-goes-after-apple-yet-again-in-first-galaxy-s4-ad

    You won’t believe it dude. It will blow your mind. S4 is actually suggesting that people buy their product and not Apple’s. Totally crazy shit. I’ve never seen anything like it before.

    Oh wait I did.

    I think my third example was Pepsi and Coke. Well get this. Pepsi actually made their name by directly attacking the coke brand.

    They actually claimed that they had a better tasting drink than coke. Can you imagine your boy doing that to you? BFF’s are supposed to stick together.

    Hopefully you’ve heard of the “two out of three prefer Pepsi over Coke in blind tests” campaigns of the 80′s and 90′s and I don’t have to give you any links to prove that.

    About the point you were making involving mountain dew and some racist DJ. What the fuck are you blowing on about, and what does it have to do with my previous comment? Can you please point out to me where I suggest that companies don’t work with companies from other industry’s, or am I too astupid to understand your irrelevant point?

    Bye the way dumb ass, “yes they do” is not an argument. Maybe you’re used to taking information on authority, but I’m not. I don’t suggest you try that around adults anymore.

    Here’s a specific example of your buddies in the internet marketing world deliberately colluding to price fix and do other unsavory anti-trust type things

    http://saltydroid.info/syndicate-shit-storm/ scroll to the second video.

    Do you see how real competitive business’s differ from the syndicate type business’s that rule the internet marketing world?

    More importantly. Do you always react in a Jim Jones type of crazy way when people question something you believe in? Is this your religion?

    Do you think it’s ok to call people retards, because they see the world of internet marketing differently to you?

    If so you may have the same problem many of your dark lords of internet marketing have.

    You can take the psychopath test here http://books.scientificamerican.com/fsg/books/the-wisdom-of-psychopaths/are-you-a-psychopath-take-the-test/

    Just messing on that last bit Otonomo. Lighten up dude..

    After-all, we’re only talking about marriage break ups, people losing their homes and grannies losing their pensions here.. lol

    My personal favorite is the Anthony Morrison affiliated boiler room that scams a 56 year old computer illiterate woman out of half her yearly salary.

    Actually, fuck the scientific America test Ontonomo. If you can listen to this audio of Debbie being financially raped by a Utah based Anthony Morrison Affiliated boiler room, without feeling sick to your stomach, you may be a sociopath

    Here it is: http://saltydroid.info/scamming-two-debbies/

    WINNER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down +7

    [Reply]

    Wyrd Reply:

    @Otonomo,

    So… what I’m hearing you say is that you’re not going to give me my $60,000 back for this broke-ass water hose you scammed me into buying.

    What a dick!

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

    [Reply]

  • Otonomo said:

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    LOSER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down -6

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Otonomo, One thing we get to find out about you here is that you are some sort of the mad expert at losing arguments:

    “And I simply cannot believe that you use Microsoft and Pepsi as an example of good business.”

    As one John Reese would say about that one: Brzzpftdtfmph! Wrong Answer.

    Example was about ANTICOMPETITIVE vs COMPETITIVE practices and no no Otonomo it wasn’t about them being the “good business” people/companies.

    “Do you know what happens when you go beyond 2% chargebacks in a month?”

    I’m not sure about that one, but when I hear mr. Jeff Walker speaking out of his own very mouth about having the 30% refund rate I guess maybe I’m supposed to get some sort of “takeaway” from that one?

    Keep playing to lose some more!

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Otonomo, Do you mean about this one and which side are you on, because you’re confusing to me more than Luther + Jack combined.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

    [Reply]

  • Wyrd said:

    My, but that’s confusing..

    Check out @Otonomo in the Salty Droid 2012 thread
    http://saltydroid.info/salty-droid-2012/#comment-107139

    vs.

    @Otonomo in the Ed Dale Scam thread
    saltydroid.info/ed-dale-30-day-challenge/#comment-107140

    You’re trolling, @Otonomo. I think you might have trolled a lot before and I just forgot. Or not. Whatever.

    You were interesting for about 3.8 seconds, but now you’re boring.

    Bye-bye!

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

    [Reply]

  • Otonomo said:

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    LOSER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down -6

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Otonomo,

    “Do you understand the difference between a chargeback and a refund?”

    Yep. I know about the difference. I even know about how sleazy vendors go to attempt to try to go about avoid getting shut down by using multiple merchant accounts under the different corps/llcs – or even about how the spammy-ringers via Russia/China do some funny things for getting people to set up “opportunities” where they go get the marks to go to get their own corp/llc and get merchant accounts from those.

    High risk 3rd party payment processors sometimes go about to use a similar idea, too.

    I can show you pretty pictures if you’re too stupid to understand about it, which probably I’m thinking about now that you are, because you think pointing out about you not understanding an anti-competitive vs competitive argument means I believe in that argument.

    AnyHOO.

    So you cool with JEFF WALKER speaking out of his mouth that he had a 30% refund rate?

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Otonomo, “Crony capitalist cheerleader.”

    OK. Here’s about my understanding of modern-TODAY capitalism:

    1. We get the multi-national biznesses that get all the funny loopholes to lower down their taxes ridiculously. The ones that the regular local-biznesses can’t really get so easily, because of it being so expensive to do it.
    2. We get the big-big-money biznesses lobbying to make tax-laws more complicated in ways to make it favorable to themselves and to make it really, really, stupid hard for the less-big-money businesses because the less-big-money business can’t afford the attorneys to understand the laws the lobbyist got put in that IRS-codificaiton thing.
    3. Then we the non-multi-national businesses that get tax-shafted by the wacky big-big-money-enacted complicated tax laws – an the little small biz guy has to pay the tax burden that the big-big-money multinational isn’t paying.
    4. Then the non-multi-national pretty much has to die and go out of business and I guess if I were to think about it for a minute it would mean that maybe less businesses in the same market would mean less competition for workers and maybe drive down wages.

    Then maybe the fixthedebt people come about telling all of us that the people they made into low-wage people or unemployed need to pay their fair share in some sort of fake “shared sacrifice” idea where people get tricked into believing it can be a good idea, because they somehow got tricked to believe they elected a Democratic president (maybe by the Koch brothers creating some sort of wacky fake-tea-party movement to try to make people believe that anybody that’s not the Tea Party and wears a Democrat-badge is a liberal president?).

    If it’s what you call CRONY capitalism, then why yes, sir that’s what I am!

    11/22:Coup.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

    [Reply]

  • Otonomo said:

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    LOSER!! :: Thumb up Thumb down -6

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Otonomo, “Don’t even try to propose that everyone uses Chinese merchants or changes their company names to avoid chargeback penalties.”

    I didn’t say it.

    I just made the statement so you know that I know about what a chargeback is – not because I think everybody does it.

    SD-Are-You-A-Kid

    Deal with that one!

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Otonomo,

    “I would also like to know why you wouldn’t stop to help that 56 year old grandmother understand how to use what she bought from mr evil guru, your focus in life when you do not even have any experience in Internet Marketing.

    That ones a question for T.F. Police.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

    [Reply]

    Jack Reply:

    @Otonomo,

    “I would like for you to explain to me WHY our credit reports are dictated by companies that have been sued by the FTC.”

    I can’t figure out why you keep attacking some fake idea of what you think my belief system is?

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

    [Reply]

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