BlogWorld New Media Expo Cofounder & CEO Rick Calvert {he insists that you call him by his full title on all occasions} … was born in a small stupid town that sat right outside a slightly larger stupid town. Rick always wanted to live in the slightly larger stupid town {where all the good people lived} :: but his family was too poor … they could barely afford to keep the goats. Rick’s mother was an Oompa-loompa :: and his father a failed professional bowler … hopelessly addicted to sniffing shoe glue. It was a pretty tough life for a big boy with big dreams of one day selling used cars at a high markup :: so he often consoled himself with tacos … huge steaming piles of tacos … and freedom fries … and cupcake ham sandwiches.

Or something :: it’s possible that I made some of that up … cupcake ham sandwiches aren’t even real.

This past March :: BlogWorld New Media Expo Cofounder & CEO Rick Calvert asked me if I’d “consider” giving a  keynote at an upcoming BlogWorld event. Of course :: he didn’t ask me himself … because he’s a cowardly bitch. And he didn’t ask me a couple of years ago when it would have been hip :: and prescient :: and brave … because he’s a cowardly {not hip or prescient} bitch.

I considered it … for about the same amount of time that Rick Calvert has spent as a popular blogger. It’s not flattering to be asked to be lame by the lame :: but it is highly gratifying to know that your fist is so far down the devil’s throat that he’s decided to start sending you RSVP’s to his daughter’s wedding. I’d hoped that email sequence would lead to even more fun :: but their capitulation was immediate and lasting … even though I had tried to start soft {for a robot}.

Not one question answered … not fucking one. No self-serving self-delusional justifications even. Just cowardly bitch :: tail between beefy thighs … guilty ass fleeing. I should have expected as much and been all pretend cute and sweet in the first couple of emails :: I know that sounds manipulative … but don’t worry because Naomi told me manipulation is okay.

The Salty Droid / BlogWorld convo was printed in May for no particular reason :: the best possible reason … just a funny coincidence that it happened to be near the top of the front page when The Verge’s Scamworld epic printed. The first comment about Scamworld was on the Blogworld post :: and that post absorbed much of the first day traffic spike while I read and processed The Verge’s content … and the other huge pile of “content” that that day’s events created.

“How funny it is how much this fucking sucks for Rick Calvert” :: thought me that morning … while Rick Calvert was thinking something like the opposite.

BlogWorld New Media Expo Cofounder & CEO Rick Calvert should have called me like he said he was going to :: he should have made an effort to answer my questions like he said he was going to … then maybe he wouldn’t have found himself in the awkward position of needing to slag me off all over the interwebs so shortly after asking me to appear at his dumb thing.

tweets BlogWorld CEO Rick Calvert the day after he was forced to take Scamworld personally. Matt Cutts pretended that The Verge was “painting with a wide brush” … in hopes that no one would notice all the scammer shit that Google has smeared all over its own doodled face. Why use wide brushes when can you just use your dirty :: filthy :: you know exactly what you’re fucking doing … fingers? Right Google? Lots of d-bags :: including Rick Calvert … glommed on to Matt’s tweet like a lifeline to continued legitimacy. Mr. Cutts is going to be surprised how long my memory is on such matters.

When Danny Sullivan changed his mind about the tone of his response :: and wrote something more reasoned … BlogWorld CEO Rick Calvert was there in the comments … barely treading water in his pool of piss {mostly Naomi’s}.

This is where the courage part comes in Danny. We have been talking about this internally for months and even considered inviting Salty to speak at the show. The idea was to have him debate someone or a couple of people who would call themselves internet marketers. According to Salty everyone who could possibly be considered an internet marketer is by definition a scammer.

He is not alone in his opinion. This debate over what is and what is not legitimate and or ethical goes on at our show between speakers as well as attendees every year. Our event certainly isn’t alone. I know similar conversations happen at SXSW, Affiliate Summit, certainly at SMX and other SEO events.

Up until now at our event at least this debate has occurred in in the aisles, corridors and private meetings not in the formal conference. When I proposed this idea earlier this year, we had a heated internal debate. We asked several members of our community who were vehemently against it. Many content creators do not want to have this conversation out of fear of being labeled a scammer when they clearly are not. We also learned quite a bit more about Salty. I am sure you will agree and can appreciate that he engages in a form of SEO blackmail; using keywords to lump legitimate business people with scammers. That certainly isn’t the kind of person we want speaking at our event.

It’s not the sort of person they want speaking at their event :: expecially after that person refused to speak at their event … and then handed them their ass in public.

BlogWorld didn’t consider asking me to do a debate :: but they did ask me to consider doing a keynote … in a fashion that would have implied that I don’t think that BlogWorld is part of the problem … when I so totally do. “Considering a debate” is what BlogWorld New Media Expo Cofounder & CEO Rick Calvert wishes had happened now that I’m even awesomer than I was before.

And for the fucking record :: had BlogWorld asked me to do a debate with some A-teamer {say Brain Clark} about whether or not the whole idea of BlogWorld and Internet Marketing is a scam perpetrated by mega-bastards … I would have immediately agreed.

Anytime :: anywhere … posers.

And :: “SEO blackmail” = ?

… you mean like the part where I keyword stuff to make fun of BlogWorld fake gurus who try and sell ridiculous keyword stuffing suggestion software? Or do you mean the part where people offer me money :: and flattery :: and opportunities … and I tell them to get bent? Cause I think you’re prolly confused about the meaning of both those terms.

When some peeps called Calvert out for being such a stupid cake hole :: he got all up on his high horse {that poor horse} demanding that names be named …

“Could you please tell me which of our “many” speakers and sponsors are scammers? I am not aware of a single one…

You are making a very serious accusation and I would sincerely appreciate it if you backed it up with some form of evidence…

I don’t think it is unreasonable for me to ask you to clarify exactly who you mean by that. Salty didn’t make that comment you did. Own your own words. Back up your accusations or take them back please.

Do you mean Izea, WordPress, Ford, Southwest Airlines, Overblog, Technorati, Federated Media, SEOMoz?”

… but names had already been named by myself :: the namer of names … and BlogWorld CEO Rick Calvert declined his opportunity to explain to me how Paul Colligan and David Risely are qualified to help people make money online … or how their association with {and shilling for} the worst of the worst … should be forgiven or ignored.

BlogWorld speaker Jim Kukral posted his defense of Internet Marketing the day after Danny Sullivan’s second post. He also named names …

I believe this is a hacky piece to say the least. It focuses on a few really bad apples and lumps in some quality people who don’t practice tactics that are unethical. Sure, sure, ALL of these people sell the dream. The dream of getting rich. The dream of independence. The dream of living the life you want. But if you’re going to condemn people for selling the opportunity to live a better life, you better send me off to jail right now as well. Because I’m guilty too.

Okay totally :: so Jim Kukral is guilty … who else?

Because I won’t become unethical just to make money. There’s lots of people just like me out there who have the same “problem”. David Risley, Chris Garrett, Johnny B. Truant, David Siteman Garland, Sonia Simone and Derek Halpern come to mind.

Yes :: those are some of the ones who came to my mind as well … excellent work Kukral! And it’s surely some of the names CEO Calvert was thinking of :: but timidly refusing to mention :: when he said this on Marketing Land …

However there are at least half a dozen people (maybe more) condemned as scammers on Salty’s site that are widely regarded as the most well liked, respected, and trusted bloggers in the world. I know several of them personally. They speak at our show. They are good honest people.

That is why they speak at our show. Yet you believe one bat shit crazy guy who uses keywords to associate their names with nefarious activities over hundreds of thousands of people?

One fake robot against hundreds of thousands of people :: the media :: the trade shows :: the web companies … I must be batshit {batshit like a fox}. But I’m also correct :: and I’ve made more than ample proof available to anyone willing to read it … and face up to it.

The emperor has no clothes … and he’s not the sort of person we want to see naked.

It’s not a genius :: or a lawyer :: or an innovator :: or an entrepreneur :: or a politician :: or a revolutionary … who steps up to tell the obvious truth that everyone already knows but can’t quite see. In the story that Hans Christian Andersen told us :: that we’ve been repeating to each other for almost 200 years … it’s a child. The mind of child :: the voice of the child … the no bullshit innocence of a child.

A truth repressed is rarely a complicated truth.

This post is getting long :: Rick Calvert deserves a short break for a lite snack …

Looks delicious :: like a dinner for four … for one.

I didn’t respond to CEO Calvert’s shenanigans on Marketing Land or Kukral.crap … because he’s quite successful at making himself look like an idiot without my help. But I did respond a couple of weeks later when he and Kukral ganged up on Karen Friesecke after she posted the Scamworld video and had the temerity to say the following about BlogWorld on her DoggieStylish blog

I’m sure that there are some useful technical seminars for those who are inclined to enjoy that sort of thing, but it’s the popular “gurus” that cause me concern. Gurus that will help you become a millionaire, a blog authority, a social media expert, get noticed in your niche, write killer blog content or what have you.

BlogWorld CEO Rick Calvert’s rambling response comment was more than double the length of Karen’s original post. It desperately concluded with an offer for Karen to attend BlogWorld free of charge :: where she’d have the exciting opportunity to change her mind about the obvious dubiousness of the gurus that some ranting :: profanity spewing :: fake punctuation having … fake robot child has been screaming his fucking head off about for years.

Karen’s next Doggie Stylish post was a response to CEO Calvert’s comment … and nicely debunked his bunk. His demand for named names was met :: with John Chow … a great name to name if the topic involves people who suck a wad of dung.

BlogWorld New Media Expo Cofounder & CEO Rick Calvert still mostly wanted to talk about me though :: and how I’m the real problem …

“If Salty Droid is so “misguided”, why did Shane Ketterman, your conference director, invite him to speak at BlogWorld 2012.”

Because it was my idea to invite him. There are lots of people like you Karen who read his blog and without actually doing any research believe that everyone on his site has committed some wrong. That is demonstrably not true.

As you can see he gets pretty crazy in that email thread pretty fast.

I wanted to invite him to have a debate live at our show with someone he considers to be doing wrong. Where he could make his accusations and his target could respond face to face.

The problem is no one wants to be on stage with him. He has said so many vile personally offensive things and made so many completely baseless accusations that most people think it is a mistake to give him any degree of credibility.

But Rick Calvert knows good and goddamned well that this blog is one of the few places for a person to actually do their research. Hundreds of thousands of people vs. one batshit guy … remember Rick? Or is listening to Sonia Simone :: who must be a “good honest person” who deserves “credibility” and “that’s why she speaks at our show” …  shilling for Naomi Dunford during a BlogWorld keynote supposed to count as research?

CEO Calvert’s last comment on Doggie Stylish was just for me …

I will be ready for that phone call in about a week if that works for you Salty.

Are you ok with recording the conversation? I would like to post that afterwards if you are ok with that?

I’m not sure how things are done in fancy CEO-land :: but I generally don’t respond to requests for interviews made in the comment sections of blogs about handmade dog collars … I guess I could make a one time exception though.

Sure Rick Calvert :: CEO and Cofounder of the BlogWorld New Media Expo … go ahead and call me a scant six months after you scheduled yourself to call me and then didn’t. You can name all the people I’ve wrongly accused of being scammers … and I’ll defend myself and my positions. Then I’ll name some of the scammers who have used BlogWorld to hurt people who didn’t deserve to be hurt … and you can make your defense of holding them out as reliable and reputable authorities to a credulous public.

You can totally record it … and I’ll totally record it. Because I’ll post it afterward :: and believe me you deluded little monster … you won’t.

>> bleep blog bloop