FTC

Barely even pretending to interrupt the scamconomy :: thanks for {almost} nothing.

Conscripted Consumption at Club 100

_-_

“Who would like for their own kids to have the exact same life that they’ve had so far? That should be enough motivation for you to take seriously what I’m telling you. Do something different — am I right or not?”

… semi-shouts a Colombian trainer for Herbalife’s Club 100 to her audience of impoverished recruits.

“If you earn 2,000 or 3,000 […]

The Doxing of Michelle Celarier

NYPost reporter Michelle Celarier has always been my biggest fan :: she told me so herself … right before she accused me of attempting to blackmail her. She’s fun like that.

Michelle has written dozens of short :: obsequiously pro-Ackman / anti-Herbalife … articles over the past year and a half. But in my considered estimation :: she has done […]

Vemma AutoSuit

Vemma’s not a scam. I know :: because I attended one of their big ol’ con-tastic events … and every single one of their Instagraming tweaker-speakers told me so.

Vemma’s no scam bro … YPR.

Do these peeps here look like scammers to you?

Hellz no :: they’re just a couple of sexy white kids tipping back a few cold ones … […]

Profit and Loss

Not many families can functionally recover from a five-figure loss :: but Herbalife CEO Michael O. Johnson and his family certainly could … because he’s spent the last decade profiteering handsomely from hundreds of thousands of other {much poorer} families sustaining such losses.

Pictured above {and below} are just a tiny subset of those very real people :: with their […]

Herbalife vs Black People

You know who loves them some Herbalife? iStockphoto black people … they’re fucking nuts for it.

But iStockphotos don’t have wallets :: or credit cards :: or retirement accounts :: or exploitable fears about future uncertainty … so Herbalife was hoping to increase their pyramid scheme’s reach with real live black people instead.

They started the African-American Initiative :: which is […]

Falsifyingly Herbalife

Herbalife is a fucking scam built to bilk poor people.

Whether or not it’s a proper “pyramid scheme” :: as currently defined by the FTC … is a moot point. The FTC doesn’t care about their own blurry pyramid standards :: so why should anyone else care? But that pyramid question is the one that the “we don’t hire women” assholes […]

Jesus Christ Utah Star

Jeremy Johnson :: The Christ-like Ginger King of the Mormon Mafia … in The New York Times.

It’s good … but it’s bad.
In Utah, a Local Hero Accused
Seems like a pretty fucking annoying headline :: because JJ is so obviously not a hero … but he was in fact a local hero. It says something scary dangerous about the particular […]

Rippln Ripple Rippln Rip

R u Rippln?

One ripple creates another ripple in a beautiful sequence of ever repeating ripples until :: !!boom!! … holy fucking shit you’re so fucking rich right now. You make Warren Buffet look like Ed Dale :: and all you had to do was sign up for a free app … or something … it totally works.

According to the lie-marketing :: Rippln […]

The Recovery Tax

Last week :: the FTC filed an amended complaint in the case against one of Utah’s {via New York City} worst boiler rooms … The Tax Club. The new complaint seems aimed at shoring up the government’s argument that the dozens of shell companies :: merchant accounts :: and bank accounts involved … were all in service of the same fraudulent scheme … and that […]

Krispy Kreme Konservatives

Utah’s new {but already fucking corrupt} Attorney General John Swallow is a “real conservative” :: not some fake ass conservative like Mitt Romney … or Hitler. “Real conservatives” make home-craft-sunset-word-art for Republican nominating conventions :: fake conservatives move to Berkeley and get AIDS … simple as that.

… or something.

It’s lucky for Mr. Swallow that he’s a “real conservative” :: […]