Harlan Kilstein isn’t a doctor :: and he isn’t an Internet marketing guru either … thanks to lil’ old me.
Good job me!
But he’s still a pathetic bottom feeding scammer … and every month or so someone tells me a story about Harlan trying to ruin their life with his ridiculousness.
Maybe a fake robot can keep a motherfucking d-bag from getting huge … but he can’t keep them from existing. There are police in Boca right?
Anywayz :: HK has a new bullshit site about the meditations. The site has 21,000 Facebook …

Two lawyers walk into a bar ::
Lawyer 1:  Let’s call The Salty Droid and –
Lawyer 2: Thanks for the beer, see you around {sound of saloon door swinging on its hinges}.
Lawyers :: you see :: have an aversion to fake robots … and risks … and technologies more complicated than blackberries {the fruit} … and things that can’t be classified into check-box forms and filed alphabetically.
So when lawyers do call in on the fake robot hotline :: they’re wanting favors not troubles :: and they usually start off just like …

Not-Doctor Harlan Kilstein’s latest too dumb to be true frauduct :: BeachMillions!  It works like this …
1.  You never :: ever :: never :: ever go to the beach … just like Harlan.
2.  You don’t make any money … just like Harlan.
It’s been over a year since my first post about Not-Doctor Shitstein.  During that time he has become less and less popular :: even among life long assholes. His perverted shenanigans aren’t appreciated by ANYONE :: and the prospect of Law of Attracting my attention by promoting him has made him a virtual …

When we last checked in with Doctor Harlan Kilstein :: he was not a doctor … but he was a perverted :: d-bag :: know nothing :: sick-o :: fucking lunatic who was stealing money from the weak and vulnerable.  Let’s check in on him again shall we?
{uses chopsticks to slightly part Kilstein’s Pee ‘n Sweat ‘n Jizz™ stained curtains :: Up Periscope [ten foot pole edition] :: deep breath :: open eye and look}
Yep yep! Same same :: but now with even more fat and salt.
Do you {insert anything}?  …

Question :: Who is Jeff “Herschy” Schwerdt?
Answer :: Nobody.
That is technically the correct answer :: but it’s a bit short :: expandification required …
Jeff “SkidMark” Schwerdt is the Father {aka non-vaginal birth giver} of the Cash Flow Funnel. This is an “Extremely Limited Offer” :: in that almost nothing is on offer.  Get in NOW before it flows the rest of the way down Jeff’s leg and on to the ground :: wisdom lost forever!
But Jeff is not just about funnels and regulating his flow.  He also describes himself as …

Not-Doctor Harlan Kilstein hasn’t been having much success in business lately.  Sure he still has his pretend “seven figure Internet business” :: and that’s doing great … it will be manifesting itself into an eight figure mega-empire in no time.  But back here on Earth :: where Newtonian Physics still reign supreme :: in a humble little place called MOTHER FUCKING REALITY! :: he’s be sucking even by his own hardcore sucktacular standards.
Tactic 7 :: A $3000 sink to the bottom turd == Epic Fail {ask Google if you’d like …

There is a WAR going on between The Salty Droid and Not-Doctor Harlan Kilstein {maybe you’ve heard?}. One of the least important battles in that war is the struggle to dominate the Google rankings for the useless search term “harlan kilstein.” The ManTurd and The Droid have different approaches to the problem {natch!} :: Different Strokes for different folks/fucks.
:: The Kilstein SEO Method ::
1.  File false DMCA claims for ANY blog post :: video :: or picture that ranks on the first page.
2.  Set up a bunch of crap blogs …

Not-Doctor Harlan D. Kilstein has very little to be proud of in his miserable excuse for a life.  His “career” in education was suspiciously short and full of bridge burning failures.  His unfortunate body shape {known as The Mutated Potato} makes waddling his tremendously lumpy ass a necessity. His digestive system was described by one imaginary {and quite unprofessional} physician as :: “An absolute cluster-fuck from cake-hole to anus.” And now his “career” in copywriting / Internet Marketing Guruing is coming to an abrupt and disastrous close {also after a …

Thank the gods that someone has finally sacked-up and started taking a stand for the little guy on the Internet :: Sticking it to the heartless scammers who abuse the webz to part nice people from their money.  Of course we all know the mighty warrior of which I speak ::
:: Harlan D. Kilstein ::
Angel :: Humanitarian :: Mother Fucking Hero
Recently Not-Doctor Kilstein has started protecting Gotham by publishing ‘anti-scam’ videos {please … hold your applause until I finish}. He’s been using them to try and drive traffic to his …

A short time ago :: in a galaxy called ScammerNet Marketering 5.0 beta :: there existed a dumpy little troll that we call Not-Doctor Harlan Kilstien {because he isn’t a doctor}.  The dumpy troll needed to sell a lot of scam product to pay for his fake-pimp lifestyle {drivin’ roun’ Boca in a super dope sleeveless T-shirt :: shoutin’ at da hoes :: windows quarter way down pumpin’ Counting Crows latest CD at 4.5 – 5 on the factory speakers :: joinin’ all the freshest ‘masterminds’ :: shit like that}.
But …