Ed Dale is the Underachiever {dot com} :: or if you prefer … he’s the Tubby Nerd. Both of his nom de plumes attempt at conspicuous self-deprecation :: but end up as self-aggrandizement … due to the pathetic condition of Ed Dale’s temporal realities.
“Underachiever” wrongly implies that at least something has been achieved. And while “tubby” is clearly true enough :: being a “nerd” requires more than buying an iPad and using Facebook to rip off a bunch of grannies.
I’m thinking something like UnderTubby would be more accurate :: more descriptive … and more fun.
UnderTubby …

Do you want to see Hulk Hogan 5.0 having sex with some lady who should oughta be bein’ faithful to Bubba the Love Sponge?
Do you want Kathy Bates to hobble you with a dragon bone seriously infected with the hantavirus?
Shirly those two questions are equivalents?
Was that last question a question?
Anywayz :: turd spewing pageview whoring turd site Gawker :: whose mission is all about smearing turds all around everywhere turd style … is pretty sure you need this sex tape in your life.

“We watch this footage because it’s something we’re not …

People got burned at a Tony Robbins event :: it’s true of every Tony Robbins event … but this time some meat space flesh was involved … so I guess that makes it an official media story.
21 people treated for burns after firewalk at Tony Robbins appearance :: reported the San Jose Mercury News after the locally held event …

At least 21 people were treated for burn injuries after taking part in the crowning event of the first day of a Tony Robbins function downtown, including at least three who went …

Chris Brogan isn’t fond of bragging :: it’s just that bragging is what he does for a “career” so it’s become a bit of a habit … you know?
Chris wrote a post about The Verge’s Scamworld article :: from his home well inside Scamworld … because that’s how we fucking roll in Scamworld. Self-awareness is an impediment to crime-based-pseudo-success :: never forget that … but remember not to remember that you’re remembering it … or you might start feeling guilty about being such a major asshole.
The URL for the post …

Gnomes :: a tiny race of colorful madmen … tend to be fiercely protective of their reputations. Scammer Internet Marketing Gnomes like lil’ piss-biscuit Mike Filsaime {not to be confused with all the totally legit Internet marketing gnomes} … are especially protective of their reputations because their whole fake life is balanced on the fulcrum of a thin illusion.
So like if there was a registered sex offender organizing a family Internet Marketing cruise for one of his Gnomish companies :: he would fire that person the minute he found out about the pedophilia …

The hippie hipsters at The New Yorker liked Joe Flatley’s Scamworld epic. Says they :: between sips of green tea and shit …

Another fun piece, with a marvellous and innovative Web layout, is Joseph Flatley’s “Scamworld,” from The Verge, about the dark, wacky world of Internet con men.

It really was a fun and innovative layout. Did you notice there were no links? So many subtle touches signaling that the piece was something important … something different. The Verge really is doing amazingly creative things with layout and design :: if …

So I’m totally famous now … I can haz u monies?
Last year Engadget left AOL to become The Verge :: because AOL is like one of the stupidest things that’s ever happened … and if you breathe in their fumes for too long you’ll turn into a raging idiot addicted to teeth whiteners. Says David Carr in his NYTimes article about the move …

“In Internet years, AOL has grown long in the tooth and seems incapable of playing nice with the toys it buys. There is a great deal of …

Bob Proctor was James Arthur Ray’s mentor :: according to Bob Proctor and James Arthur Ray … even unskilled charlatans need mentoring. Bob and James mentored each other all up and down until they both learned The Secret and told Rhonda Byrne so she could attract $35 million unto her own self.
MLM doublespeak was rebranded as mainstream unicorn spirituality and James Arthur Ray went on Oprah :: Bob Proctor went on Ellen … the fake mentee becomes the fake mentor.
The Secret to success according to the movie The Secret is …

You know I hate me some gnomes :: the hats :: the tiny dumb dancing :: the chirp chirp singing … and of course the fucking scamming. Maybe it’s not fair to judge all gnomes based on my limited experience with them :: but so what … I don’t have to be fair to gnomes. Fuck you gnomes :: go away and fix some stuff with your dumb little tool sacks.
The Gnome I know is in The Syndicate :: has terrible ideas for family vacations :: has anachronistic disrespect for the …

Remember that time when I pwned Mike Koenigs like a balding little bitch?
Boom!
Pow!
Smack!
Slam!
Whamo!
Okay :: yeah … it’s happened a lot. I like to do things that are easy :: it makes me feel good about myself … like pictures in ridiculous hats.

{start over}
Remember all those times I pwned Mike Koenigs like a balding little bitch {BLB}?
You fucking better … we were just talking about it. Why can’t you remember important shit that we were just talking about? You were never like that before.  Are you taking those danged dirty drugs? …